Heartache
"Ohmygosh! It's been so long!" I say, looking into his deep brown eyes. His carefully spiked hair is just how I remember, and so is his beautiful, straight white smile.
"Yeah, its been too long," he says, his eyes locking with mine. I feel like I can't breathe, he's back, he's back in my arms.
~^~^~^~
[i]"I love this movie," he whispers in my ear, his arm around me. I lay my head on his shoulder, smelling his Axe and hairgel. His soft Hurley shirt feels like a blanket embracing my face. I feel his head roll onto mine and I close my eyes. I feel his gentle lips kiss my hair and his fingers trace my thigh. He's come back for me, he still loves me.
"Wake up! Wake up!" the yells penetrate my head that had only moments before been filled with the reminders of the year before, the year I cannot forget. The year he held me, the year he gave me my first kiss.
I rub my eyes, covering my head as my nieces scramble all across my covers, slowly pulling me from my warm cocoon. Oh yeah, we have to watch them today...I forgot their mom was running that marathon... I groan and quickly get up before they make my bed even more difficult than it already is to make.
I quickly go upstairs and take the baby, Ruby, from my dad, feeding her some yogurt. As soon as she is finish I quickly turn on Alice In Wonderland for them to watch while I take a shower.
As the steam curls around my ankles and I breathe in the sweet aroma I can't help but recall the beautiful dream. "Why didn't I give him a second chance? Its all my fault," I whisper to myself, making a foam crown upon my head with the lilac shampoo.
As I dry my hair, my music blares, and I can't help but feel tears well up in my eyes. "Goodbye my almost lover, Goodbye my hopeless dream, I'm trying not to think about you, can't you just let me be?" I sing the bittersweet words, thinking of my own Almost Lover.
"I have a surprise for you," he whispered. "Close your eyes." I quickly close my eyes and feel a rush of passion soar throughout my figure as his lips touch mine...
I shake the memory from my head, feeling my chest ache. "Its all my fault," I said. "If I had just forgiven him..."
"It was the stupidest mistake I ever made Emily!" he said to me. "You're the one I love. Not her. She lead me on again, I shouldn't have trusted her this time, and I won't trust her ever again."
"I can't...forgive you," I said. "You chose her over me, I can't give you a second chance."
That's when I break down, slowly collapsing to the tile of my bathroom floor, tears flowing out of my bright blue eyes that he once called beautiful. Sobs escape my chest, its been almost a year now, since I last saw him, but I know, I won't see him again.
I walk into my room, my eyes red and my cheeks tear stained. I throw open my dresser drawers, pulling out mounds of shirts until I find it. The last, and only picture I have of him. His beachy flannel shirt hangs open over his white T-shirt, and his brown hair is still perfectly spiked.
I hold the picture over my heart, hoping it will ease the pain, though I know it will only make it worse. I slam the door to my room, running to my bed and laying facedown on the pillow, tears and screams quickly soak it with heartache. I roll over, ragged breaths coming from my lungs and I stare at the picture.
I tear an edge, then another edge, then the grass, then his hand...his lips, his eyes, his hair...its gone, all torn and away.
But the memory still remains, the love is still there, and the heartache still lingers.
