I’m planning on making this three parts long. Please review! Tear it to pieces! I’m not sure about it at all, in fact I don’t know how good it is, but I’d really love anyone to tell my any opinion at all. Please tear it apart. This is the prologue for it all. And I know that there isn't a love story happening in this chapter just yet, but since it's the prologue it sets something up. I can't think of a good title just yet without giving away what will happen later on.
Prologue
You all will probably hate me, and then later love me. Why? Because, I hated myself, and then later, I too felt loved. I was sarcastic, dark, sadistic, and completely stubborn. In fact, I frustrated myself more than others frustrated me. Don’t worry though, my story isn’t about a struggle with an inner vampire self lusting for blood, or about a lost werewolf aiming to find a pack. It’s not about a stereotypical emo girl finding love in someone who later leaves her to her destructive decisions, or about Romeo and Juliet type love story, modern day. It’s about my death, and the high improbability surrounding it.
“Come on now Sadie, we need to go,” my mom called out. I sat on my bed, staring blankly into the mirror. My blonde hair was looking thinner now, and a certain gauntness had taken to my already sharp features. Green eyes glared back at me in the mirror, and I realized how harsh I looked when I was only bored. My full lips were pursed and I could detect faint wrinkle lines around my brow although I was only seventeen.
“I’m coming,” I replied, realizing she was probably about to knock on my door to come in and get me. I ran my hand through my hair, suddenly feeling deflated. I was getting these random moments of fatigue more and more frequently. It was around seven in the morning now, and my head was pounding so hard as I stood that I grabbed my bed frame in a panic. Black dots swarmed my vision, and I quickly took several deep breaths. I shook it off, like normal, but the throbbing was constantly there.
I quickly threw on a pair of baggy grey sweatpants and an old tennis camp t-shirt. My straight hair was quickly thrown into a ponytail and I still had my glasses on. I walked out the door and my mom sighed.
“You’ll really make a good impression,” my mother said, slightly joking, although I knew she actually was concerned about my first appearance where we were going.
“I’m going to a doctor’s office, big deal,” I said bitterly. I was used to getting poked and prodded because of my auto-immune disorder, but my mom thought there was something else wrong with me. Apparently I was being constantly moody, with pounding headaches, and on most days, I felt nauseas. I suggested that I had the flu, but my mom wouldn’t let that fly, knowing I hadn’t had a temperature in a couple months, and that if I really did have the flu, with my immune deficiency, I would have an extremely high fever. Blasted mothers knowing more about their children then the children know about themselves.
“Well, I suppose you have a point there,” my mother said as she opened the front door for me. Without speaking anymore, we got in our 2007 black Ford Explorer. I threw my things in the passenger seat, but then decided to lie across the middle row of seats. We started off for the doctor’s office and within a matter of moments, I fell asleep.
I jolted awake. Why? Because my mom was prodding with a magazine and telling me we were there. I sat up and everything was fuzzy, even though I had my glasses on. I blinked hard, but nothing happened. After I closed my eyes for about thirty seconds and then opened them, everything was clear.
“Ready for a day full of fun?” my mom asked. I knew she was being slightly sarcastic, since I was scheduled for a MRI and a CAT Scan. The Indianapolis St. Vincents Hospital was nothing new to me, since I lived in southern Indiana and went there for my medication for my immune disorder. I got something called Remicade once every five weeks, but this time I wouldn’t be heading for the seventh floor like usual. Instead, we checked in and preparations for the tests went underway. My MRI was scheduled first, doctors orders.
“Please remove your glasses miss,” the technician told me. I happily obliged, but the world was truly plunged into obscurity now. I relied on my other senses, although my nose didn’t seem to be the best. I heard the clinking of metal and faintly smelled the sterilized atmosphere as they injected my with the dye. I fell asleep why the machine buzzed up and down my body.
I fell asleep actually, and when I awoke, the technician was gently prodding me, just like my mom had. He gave me my glasses back and then with him and my mother gently dragging me along, I went to my CAT Scan. I realized that I hadn’t ate anything for over twelve hours, just like the doctor said, but now my stomach grumbled unhappily. Finally, I was lying on the table, after being injected with dye, and heard the machine purr around my body.
Moments like these are the times that you reflect. I thought about my junior year. Since it was around two, my best friend, Casey, was probably sitting in math class bored. This was the only class she didn’t have with either me or her boyfriend Chase. I cringed at the word boyfriend. Who needs love, I thought, when you can have wonderful friends at the hospital?
I had been with two boys my whole life. One was my first true crush in seventh grade. We flirted a lot, but nothing ever came of it until eight grade year. He kissed me at a party and I fell hard for him, but later he said we just made amazing friends. The second boy only wanted me for my innocence and he planned on taking it away. After we kissed, he told me everything he wanted from me, and I had to leave it. Apparently my kisses were the death of a relationship that could happen. I didn’t think I was that bad at it either.
Still, at that point I had given up on anything that involved boys. Slowly, I found myself fading from love altogether. For awhile, all that I loved was my family, but eventually even that too began fading away. Sure, I enjoyed many people in my life, but I knew that I didn’t truly love any of them.
“You’re all done,” the technician said. I was lost in my thoughts, but soon he had me back to my mother and she had me on the way home.
~*~
“You’re results are in,” my mother said. It was a day exactly like the day I had taken the tests, “They say we need to come in to get them.” I cringed at the sound of that. Still, for the past two weeks, my symptoms of whatever had been getting more severe. I had numerous fights with Casey, and I had caused a couple major problems between my mother and father.
I pulled on black sweatpants and an old basketball camp t-shirt. I left my glasses on and put my hair back. The day felt exactly the same, as if no time had passed at all. We got to Indianapolis within a couple hours and soon we were sitting in the doctors office waiting for the answer to all my problems. But that’s not what it turned out to be at all. As the doctor came, I saw that haunted look on his face. As his eyes swept over my body, my head was already buzzing.
“Sadie Calloway,” the doctor said slowly, his eyes boring into mine. Tears were already on the edges of my eyelids and my throat began to constrict.
“I regret to say this,” he continued. My mother grabbed my hand now, and our sweaty palms linked together.
“But you have a cancerous tumor located on your brainstem and your frontal lobe.” The doctor gave the final blow. I felt the entire world crashing down around me, and in one quick sob, I fell into my mother’s arm and fainted.
