Equlibrium

Equilibrium

Swaying , swaying as I write and as I write I bleed.
I bleed all over my page and as I bleed it soaks.
It soaks and my words are no longer clear.
My ideas are washed away in the gushing of blood.
My thoughts crucified.
I sit and hope for an answer.
As I sit 2000 years pass, then another 10.
Nothing.
No change.
The sacrifice a waste.

Questioning, Questioning as I write and as I write I sing.
I sing for the answers that come and as I sing they grow.
Answers drain my song and my song is no longer there.
My ideas are washed away in the gushing of thought.
My thoughts are resurrected.
I sit in silence.
Eternity never passes.
Nothing.
No change.
But Regret.

Grieving, Grieving as I stagnate and as the time passes I die.
I die for my questions, song and answers.
My death brings my truths, the truths that were always present.
My light brought above and cannot wash away.
My soul revived in the gushing of love.
My heart is resumed.
I rest in peace.
Time no longer a factor.
Was it ever?
No questions, No answers.
Equilibrium.

I really really like this. I love the format you used for this and there aren't any grammar issues.
But you kind of lost me on the story you're trying to inform us of through this poem. You're lacking some detail on that. And you also lost me of the place he's supposed to be at. Where is he?? Why an how is he a sacrifice?? What IS the sacrafice?? What is he waiting for?? Just add a little more detail. I know it's clear in your eyes but you have to remmeber, we don't know what you're thinking.
I hope I helped!!
<3;
Layla

KandjaKabamba wrote:Equilibrium

Swaying , swaying as I write and as I write I bleed.
I bleed all over my page and as I bleed it soaks.
It soaks and my words are no longer clear.
My ideas are washed away in the gushing of blood.
My thoughts crucified.
I sit and hope for an answer.
As I sit 2000 years pass, then another 10.
Nothing.
No change.
The sacrifice a waste.

Sacrificiing your blood to get answers, what type of answers are you looking for, do you know?

Questioning, Questioning as I write and as I write I sing.
I sing for the answers that come and as I sing they grow.
Answers drain my song and my song is no longer there.
My ideas are washed away in the gushing of thought.
My thoughts are resurrected.
I sit in silence.
Eternity never passes.
Nothing.
No change.
But Regret.

Regretting what? Are you looking for the answers or are you waiting for them to come to you. Get up and find them, do something, don't regret.

Grieving, Grieving as I stagnate and as the time passes I die.
I die for my questions, song and answers.
My death brings my truths, the truths that were always present.
My light brought above and cannot wash away.
My soul revived in the gushing of love.
My heart is resumed.
I rest in peace.
Time no longer a factor.
Was it ever?
No questions, No answers.
Equilibrium.

Peace is all that any of us can ask for, even the best of us.
~~~
In short, I do like the poem, it's really good. You have a gift, cherish it and keep going. This is really good.

The poem is about the inherit Christian sacrifice that you make when you grow up in that sort of upbringing.
The answers are your life experiences that lead to personal growth.
The song is happiness.
Death is death
Equilibrium is peace and oneness with the self.

Ps. There is no he. Its a cultural and spiritual personification.