zimbabwe

Zimbabwe

The lonely cry of the fish eagle
The hustle and bustle of Harare
The rainbows of Victoria Falls glowing bright

The cry of the cockerel comes to wake us up
The crickets croaking all night long
The place where I once belonged

the day i said goodbye,
floods of tears ran down my face,
the anger,
the pain,

will never leave me,
for a part of me remains there,
in Zimbabwe my home,

maybe one day i shall return,
see my beloved country once more,
Zimbabwe my home

Hello,

I liked this, but I think that if you really want to portray your emotions, tell us how you felt leaving. I know the feeling of moving house, and leaving your friends and everything that is familiar to you behind. So I can realate to how you feel, I just wanted to know how you really felt when you had to leave. Your description of Zimbabwe is really great though, I can see that you thought it was beautiful Well Done

Out of intrest, where do you live now?

Keep Writing,
~Lydia

thanks i now live in Europe, i wont say anymore of my location for safety reasons thank you very much for your review

Europe, nice. I can see why you'd miss Zimbabwe though, Europe must be a little dull after that

yah and alot colder

Hey there,
Welcome to YWS.

Firstly, I enjoyed the originality of your poem and the images were okay - always rooms for improvement - but 'least they delivered some effect. My favourite thing about your poetry was how you've structured it. I really enjoyed the fluency and rhythm.
However, I don't think you portrayed any true passion in it. Give us what you feel, wrench my heart out, put in everything.

Anyway, keep writing,
Ben