This is a story I've been working on for awhile...hope you like it! =D
(this is what ud find on like the back of a book....like a summary thing)
Abigail Wither aka Abby and Noah Jackson have been friends since forever but as they prepare to exit high school and enter their new lives on there own everything begins to go topsy-turvy. Things become even crazier when the mysterious new kid, Max Benzy, asks out Abby. Will Abby and Noah stay friends through the chaos or will the end of high school be the end of their friendship?
A story about friendship, love, relationships, choices, and the journey of a couple of wacky seniors heading out into the real world.
(and heres the story)
Summer Before Grade 12
As they lay there underneath the starry skies her mind wandered away into the universe.
“Hey Abby?”
“Yah Noah?” She asked looking away from the skies and to Bobby who lay beside her.
“Do you ever wonder about what’s gonna happen next year?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well since you’re leaving and all.”
“Hopefully I won’t end up having to switch schools since it will be our last year.”
“Let’s hope so.”
“Why you going to miss me Noah?”
“Maybe.” He said turning away from me and back up to the stars.
“Noah?”
“Yah?”
“Is there anything you wanna tell me?”
“No I don’t think so, why?”
“Just wondering.”
“Well there is one thing that I want to ask you.”
“Shoot.”
“You know how the dance is gonna be coming up…”
“Are you asking me to the dance Noah?”
“Yes, I know it’s pathetic-”
“No it’s not.”
“It’s not?”
“Nah, I’d love to go with you.”
“You would?”
“Sure, you are my best friend after all.”
“So we’d go as friends?”
“Yah, why?”
“It’s just…never mind.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“Did you not want to go as just friends?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you like me or something?”
“Of course I like you Abby, you’re my best friend.”
“I wasn’t really talking about that kind of like. I’ll rephrase the question, do you have a crush on me?”
“No, of course not.”
“Okay, for a second a thought you did.”
“Moving on.”
“Yah so are you gonna get me a corsage?”
“I guess I should, shouldn’t I?”
“Yah.”
“Hmmm what kind of corsage would I get you?”
“A pretty one.”
“Well duh.”
“And it should match my dress.”
“Do you already have a dress?”
“No. I wasn’t expecting to get asked out actually.”
“Ouch I’m hurt. You didn’t think I was gonna let you miss the dance did you?”
“So you were planning to ask me?”
“Yah.”
“What none of the other girls are good enough for you?”
“Nah, they’re all just sluts.”
“I see. I guess I have to go dress shopping now.”
“You could wear jeans…”
“Hmm no. I think for once in my life I’ll dress like a girl in those tv shows where the only things important in life are scandals, boys, and clothes.”
“You mean Gossip Girl?”
“I guess in some ways. Anyways are you wearing a tux?”
“Nah I thought I’d wear my swim trunks.”
“Ha ha very funny.”
“Who said I’m joking?”
“Oh god. Please don’t wear your swim trunks Noah.”
“I won’t.”
“So I’m gonna get to see you in a tux?”
“Yah I guess.”
“That’ll be interesting.”
“Ha ha you in a dress will be interesting.”
“It’s not like I never wear dresses.”
Noah looked at me then quirked his pierced eyebrow.
“Okay okay I hardly ever wear dresses.”
“Mmhmm.”
Just then a low buzzing sound pierced the night.
“What was that?” Noah asked.
“My phone.” I said pulling it out of my front jean pocket. “Sorry.”
“No prob.”
“Hey mom? Yah sorry. I’ll be home in five. Okay. Love yah too. Bye.”
“You have to go?”
“Yah sorry. I’ll talk to yah later?” Abby said getting up brushing herself off.
“Yah sure.”
“Okay. Do I get a hug?”
“Then I have to get up.” Noah moaned.
“Oh well then I’ll just go.”
“Just kidding.” He said then got up and squished Abby with a huge bear hug lifting her off the ground.
“Holy crap! Noah put me down!”
“Calm down Abbs.”
“I thought we had discussed the no-picking-me-up-without-my-okay issue.”
“I think I skipped that day.”
“Well then now you know.”
“Huh? What?” He said then smiled mischeviously at me.
“Jerk.” She muttered poking him in the ribs.
“Oooooooh.”
“Oh shut up. I’m leaving now.” She said walking over to her bike that leaned against the fence.
“Nooooo. I’m sorry.”
“Mmhmm. I’ll talk to yah later okay?”
“No you aren’t leaving.”
“Yes I am.” Abby said getting on her bike.
“No you can’t leave me here all alone. What if an alien comes and abducts me?”
“Tell him greetings and be nice.”
“Ouch you don’t even care if I am abducted by aliens?”
“If you really want I’ll escort you home so no aliens abduct.”
“Okay!”
“You are a weird child.” Abby said dismounting her bike then began pushing it along.
“I know, isn’t it great?” Noah said then gave me a goofy grin.
“I’m gonna have to say no. Now walk, the faster I get you home the faster I can get home and the bigger the chance that my mom won’t ground me.”
“You grounded?”
“Yes me grounded as in I can’t hang out with you or talk to you for a long period of time.”
“Then why are we walking? Get on the handlebars.”
“What?”
“Get on the handlebars of your bike.”
“Okay.” She said then gave her bike to Noah who got on the bike then Abby hopped onto the handlebars. “Now what?”
“Now you hold on for your life.” He said then they were off speeding down the road to his house.
please comment
Please don't be offended, but this story could be better. There are absolutely no descreption -or anything for that matter- besides dialogue. It gets really old. It just her talking, him talking, her talking, him talking. Try putting actual paragraphs into the story, and just how they are saying it (ex: "I like puppies," said Bob cheerfully. Insted of: "I like puupies." "Me too." "That's awesome."). Describe the surrondings, the characters appearance, what the characters are feeling... just anything that makes the story more than just a bunch of dialogue.
