A ridiculous attempt at August Poem month. I hope you don't got blind =_=
Spoiler
A box full of toys sit by your feet,
a rainbow array of your childhood.
Old kitchen supplies from the time flower print was in,
and a few shards of glass hide in your cupboard.
Broken lamps and rusting old keys,
Overused gym shorts and underused denim jackets
from the time they were considered fashionable.
Fads and the fashion, time passed by.
These are the remains of the past,
sort of like an unorganized timeline.
Now what do you do with the past?
Leave it in a box, leave it to decay.
They don't disappear, like memories;
they sit there, in the back of your mind,
in the back of your garage, covered in a layer of dust.
If you can't make them vanish into thin air,
you sell them. Maybe someone else will
put
your
stuff
to good use.
You can even get a buck or two out of the situation,
but that's only if you know what you're doing.
I'd suggest googling about it first.
If you don't want to sell, Salvation Army, the keepers of time,
would happily accept
your
stuff.
Correction,
your
old
stuff.
So here it is....
How to Sell Things at a Yard Sale:
Rule number one-- make everything look nice and colorful,
hide anything (and everything) faded or decayed.
Yes, that means pulling out your disco pants from back in the seventies,
your neon green fish nets from prom,
and draping them over the sides of the clothes bins.
Your grandpa's old fake mustache...
You hide that, deep inside the boxes, beneath those purple and white roller skates
you said you'd use to exercise and get active, but never used.
Arrange
your
boxes
in a nice line,
set your tables in a special formation.
Rule Number Two--- grab that collection of Wal-Mart plastic bags from your drawer,
those Ziplocs from your pantry, and as many trash bags as possible. Sell in bulk.
"Fill a bag of clothes for 5 dollars."
It makes people feel like they're getting a good deal,
plus people like filling bags over the rim.
Who doesn't like a good bargain?
"Fill a trash bag for twenty dollars!"
Look, there's a lady with her dogs that could pass for bears.
You have a cart full of unused, unloved stuffed animals.
She wants to buy them as play toys for her dogs.
Talk to her about your love of dogs
and distract her while she fills her shopping bag with
your
merchandise.
Two hours ago, your cart was full.
Now it's empty.
She bought them all,
except the ones with beads, of course.
You can gives those to the kids who are looking at them right now,
the ones whose parents are telling them to put it down
because they have enough stuffed animals.
It's only a quarter, just give it to them.
Rule Number 3-- Sound professional, make pretty signs.
Yes, sugarcoat everything from glitterfying your "SALE" signs to saying
"these are high quality slippers, they hug your feet."
Maybe add in a few "fabulous"'s or "since I like you, I'll give you a deal"'s.
Rule Number 4-- Go with your gut feeling.
Know the value of what you are selling, and sell your old games at Gamestop first.
Don't want to be the one who sells a collectible bobble head for 50 cents, do you?
Check the value of your items,
and if you think someone might come later with a better offer,
then don't sell it.
Raise the value of
your
items
by being confident with your prices and your deals and your decisions.
"It's five dollars."
"I have two."
"Deal."
You bought it from the ninety nine cents store anyway.
Rule Number 5--- Look around for thieves, especially that person known as "the Shady Lady."
Yes, the Shady Lady is a woman who goes against your super amazingtasticful deals and wants a cheaper price.
She's the one who sneaks in 5 dollar slippers at the bottom of her bag
when the deal was "fill a bag of clothes for five dollars."
She filled it over the rim too.
She's the one who'll break the stitch on one of the dresses you never wore
just to lower the price.
The one who'll question your prices and will leave her bags beneath
your
umbrella
while she and her friend check out the other sellers in the Swap Meet area.
So to make the game fair, you remove those slippers she hid in her bag
and that expensive winter jacket she tried to fit in there.
She'll never notice.
What do you do at the end of the day, when all the unwanted items are left laying around?
Simple.
That lady from earlier, the one who wanted to donate to the village she came from,
you give her everything for twenty dollars and help her and her husband move
the items to the back of their truck.
Hey, you've made over five hundred bucks.
Everyone else selling their junk didn't make anything close to what you made
because their prices were too high.
Remember your goal is to get rid of everything.
Make it cheap and set your mind on getting rid of everything by bulk.
Now...
with your five hundred and twenty six bucks,
you can go over to one of the other stands
and buy a brownie for you and your friend,
and now you can get that new DSI you wanted, and so can your sister.
All in all, it was a good day. Your feet hurt, a lot, but I hear that the DSI takes photos.
-Shina
a rainbow array of your childhood.
Old kitchen supplies from the time flower print was in,
and a few shards of glass hide in your cupboard.
Broken lamps and rusting old keys,
Overused gym shorts and underused denim jackets
from the time they were considered fashionable.
Fads and the fashion, time passed by.
These are the remains of the past,
sort of like an unorganized timeline.
Now what do you do with the past?
Leave it in a box, leave it to decay.
They don't disappear, like memories;
they sit there, in the back of your mind,
in the back of your garage, covered in a layer of dust.
If you can't make them vanish into thin air,
you sell them. Maybe someone else will
put
your
stuff
to good use.
You can even get a buck or two out of the situation,
but that's only if you know what you're doing.
I'd suggest googling about it first.
If you don't want to sell, Salvation Army, the keepers of time,
would happily accept
your
stuff.
Correction,
your
old
stuff.
So here it is....
How to Sell Things at a Yard Sale:
Rule number one-- make everything look nice and colorful,
hide anything (and everything) faded or decayed.
Yes, that means pulling out your disco pants from back in the seventies,
your neon green fish nets from prom,
and draping them over the sides of the clothes bins.
Your grandpa's old fake mustache...
You hide that, deep inside the boxes, beneath those purple and white roller skates
you said you'd use to exercise and get active, but never used.
Arrange
your
boxes
in a nice line,
set your tables in a special formation.
Rule Number Two--- grab that collection of Wal-Mart plastic bags from your drawer,
those Ziplocs from your pantry, and as many trash bags as possible. Sell in bulk.
"Fill a bag of clothes for 5 dollars."
It makes people feel like they're getting a good deal,
plus people like filling bags over the rim.
Who doesn't like a good bargain?
"Fill a trash bag for twenty dollars!"
Look, there's a lady with her dogs that could pass for bears.
You have a cart full of unused, unloved stuffed animals.
She wants to buy them as play toys for her dogs.
Talk to her about your love of dogs
and distract her while she fills her shopping bag with
your
merchandise.
Two hours ago, your cart was full.
Now it's empty.
She bought them all,
except the ones with beads, of course.
You can gives those to the kids who are looking at them right now,
the ones whose parents are telling them to put it down
because they have enough stuffed animals.
It's only a quarter, just give it to them.
Rule Number 3-- Sound professional, make pretty signs.
Yes, sugarcoat everything from glitterfying your "SALE" signs to saying
"these are high quality slippers, they hug your feet."
Maybe add in a few "fabulous"'s or "since I like you, I'll give you a deal"'s.
Rule Number 4-- Go with your gut feeling.
Know the value of what you are selling, and sell your old games at Gamestop first.
Don't want to be the one who sells a collectible bobble head for 50 cents, do you?
Check the value of your items,
and if you think someone might come later with a better offer,
then don't sell it.
Raise the value of
your
items
by being confident with your prices and your deals and your decisions.
"It's five dollars."
"I have two."
"Deal."
You bought it from the ninety nine cents store anyway.
Rule Number 5--- Look around for thieves, especially that person known as "the Shady Lady."
Yes, the Shady Lady is a woman who goes against your super amazingtasticful deals and wants a cheaper price.
She's the one who sneaks in 5 dollar slippers at the bottom of her bag
when the deal was "fill a bag of clothes for five dollars."
She filled it over the rim too.
She's the one who'll break the stitch on one of the dresses you never wore
just to lower the price.
The one who'll question your prices and will leave her bags beneath
your
umbrella
while she and her friend check out the other sellers in the Swap Meet area.
So to make the game fair, you remove those slippers she hid in her bag
and that expensive winter jacket she tried to fit in there.
She'll never notice.
What do you do at the end of the day, when all the unwanted items are left laying around?
Simple.
That lady from earlier, the one who wanted to donate to the village she came from,
you give her everything for twenty dollars and help her and her husband move
the items to the back of their truck.
Hey, you've made over five hundred bucks.
Everyone else selling their junk didn't make anything close to what you made
because their prices were too high.
Remember your goal is to get rid of everything.
Make it cheap and set your mind on getting rid of everything by bulk.
Now...
with your five hundred and twenty six bucks,
you can go over to one of the other stands
and buy a brownie for you and your friend,
and now you can get that new DSI you wanted, and so can your sister.
All in all, it was a good day. Your feet hurt, a lot, but I hear that the DSI takes photos.
-Shina
EDIT:
A box full of toys sit by your feet,
a rainbow array of your childhood.
Old kitchen supplies from the time flower print was in
and a few shards of glass hide in your cupboard.
Broken lamps and rusting old keys,
Overused gym shorts and underused denim jackets
from the time they were in.
Fads and the fashion, time passed by.
These are the remains of the past,
sort of like an unorganized timeline.
Now what do you do with the past?
Leave it in a box, leave it to decay.
They don't disappear, like memories;
they sit there, in the back of your mind,
in the back of your garage, covered in a layer of dust.
If you can't make them vanish into thin air,
you sell them. Maybe someone else will
put
your
stuff
to good use.
You can even get a buck or two out of the situation,
but that's only if you know what you're doing.
I'd suggest googling about it first.
If you don't want to sell, Salvation Army, the keepers of time,
would happily accept
your
stuff.
Correction,
your
old
stuff.
So here it is....
How to Sell Things at a Yard Sale:
Rule number one-- make everything look nice and colorful,
hide anything (and everything) faded or decayed.
Yes, that means pulling out your disco pants from back in the seventies,
your neon green fish nets from prom,
and draping them over the sides of the clothes bins.
Your grandpa's old fake mustache...
You hide that, deep inside the boxes, beneath those purple and white roller skates
you said you'd use to exercise and get active, but never used.
Arrange
your
boxes
in a nice line,
set your tables in a special formation.
Rule Number Two--- grab that collection of Wal-Mart plastic bags from your drawer,
those Ziplocs from your pantry, and as many trash bags as possible. Sell in bulk.
"Fill a bag of clothes for 5 dollars."
It makes people feel like they're getting a good deal,
plus people like filling bags over the rim.
Who doesn't like a good bargain?
"Fill a trash bag for twenty dollars!"
Look, there's a lady with her dogs that could pass for bears.
You have a cart full of unused, unloved stuffed animals.
She wants to buy them as play toys for her dogs.
Talk to her about your love of dogs
and distract her while she fills her shopping bag with
your
merchandise.
Two hours ago, your cart was full.
Now it's empty.
She bought them all,
except the ones with beads, of course.
You can give those to the kids who are looking at them right now,
the ones whose parents are telling them to put it down
because they have enough stuffed animals.
It's only a quarter, just give it to them.
Rule Number 3-- Sound professional, make pretty signs.
Yes, sugarcoat everything from glitterfying your "SALE" signs to saying
"these are high quality slippers, they hug your feet."
Maybe add in a few "fabulous"'s or "since I like you, I'll give you a deal"'s.
Rule Number 4-- Go with your gut feeling.
Know the value of what you are selling, and sell your old games at Gamestop first.
Don't want to be the one who sells a collectible bobble head for 50 cents, do you?
Check the value of your items,
and if you think someone might come later with a better offer,
then don't sell it.
Raise the value of
your
items
by being confident with your prices and your deals and your decisions.
"It's five dollars."
"I have two."
"Deal."
You bought it from the ninety nine cents store anyway.
Rule Number 5--- Look around for thieves, especially that person known as "the Shady Lady."
Yes, the Shady Lady is a woman who goes against your super amazingtasticful deals and wants a cheaper price.
She's the one who sneaks in 5 dollar slippers at the bottom of her bag
when the deal was "fill a bag of clothes for five dollars."
She filled it over the rim too.
She's the one who'll break the stitch on one of the dresses you never wore
just to lower the price.
The one who'll question your prices and will leave her bags beneath
your umbrella
while she and her friend check out the other sellers in the Swap Meet area.
So to make the game fair, you remove those slippers she hid in her bag
and that expensive winter jacket she tried to fit in there.
She'll never notice.
What do you do at the end of the day, when all the unwanted items are left laying around?
Simple.
That lady from earlier, the one who wanted to donate to the village she came from,
you give her everything for twenty dollars and help her and her husband move
the items to the back of their truck.
Hey, you've made over five hundred bucks.
Everyone else selling their junk didn't make anything close to what you made
because their prices were too high.
Remember your goal is to get rid of
everything.
Make it cheap and set your mind on getting rid of everything by bulk.
Now...
with your five hundred and twenty six bucks,
you can go over to one of the other stands
and buy a brownie for you and your friend,
and now you can get that new DSI you wanted, and so can your sister.
All in all, it was a good day. Your feet hurt, a lot, but I hear that the DSI takes photos.
-Shina
Side Note: xD Yes, this is sort of a vignette, a window of my life.
I had a yard sale sometime in April and the other sellers came up to me and said
"I could tell right from the beginning you were going to make the most sales.
I saw you rolling that cart of stuffed animals around earlier and wondered
why I hadn't thought of that. Good work."
He was an old guy. I made more money than him. Cool.
I still have one more thing to edit on my list, though.
