Valen

~I will post up the first story of My four seasons saga when I finish some of my fallen stories first. Enjoy~

For our hearts are as cold as ice
that makes us hateful and yet sensual,
For we are the fallen enemy
who finds passion in your sweet blood,
For there is a secret curse
that is yet to be broken.
We are Sons of Darkness

For our hearts are as cold as ice

that makes us hateful and yet sensual,

For we are the fallen enemy

who finds passion in your sweet blood,

For there is a secret curse

that is yet to be broken.

We are Sons of Darkness

Hey Merry Ok; I'm a complete failure when it comes to poetry so I won't be able to offer you much help, sorry
I really love this poem, it's great
It has a fantastic flow to it, and portrays great emotion. I love it.
I can't really be of much more help than that, sorry, I can't see any mistakes. Well done
- Kirsten xxx

For our hearts are as cold as ice

that makes us hateful and yet sensual,

For we are the fallen enemy

who finds passion in your sweet blood,

For there is a secret curse

that is yet to be broken.

We are Sons of Darkness

__________________________

Hey I read your other poem as well.
I like the theme that you have got goin on between the two poems. Daughters of the Dawn and Sons of the Darkness.

I would now like to read the saga to get more understanding.

It is a cool idea though well done!:D

HI, I loved your poem. It was short and sweet but so powerful. I got a really good picture in my head of what you were trying to say. I found it very unnerving if you get what I mean. I was written superbly. Keep writing, Moonstar x

For our hearts are as cold as ice

that makes us hateful and yet sensual,

For we are the fallen enemy

who finds passion in your sweet blood,

For there is a secret curse

that is yet to be broken.

We are Sons of Darkness

-

Hello, firstly I must say this was short but VERY sweet! There's a lot going on and I like that in a short poem. I don't really know what the secret curse is or why they are fallen enemies, but that makes me want to read your Four Seasons saga! At first I thought that it was about some Demoness or Succubus or something, but the use of "Sons" at the end obviously disproves that. Again, I presume that this is like additional content to your Four Seasons saga and that the Sons of Darkness are explained in there. Something about this was really sadistic and lovely! Keep up the good work!