I Am Geek!

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I Am Geeek

I am a geek.
I can apply the force to any situation-
I’m prone to massive humiliation

I Am geek!
I subscribe to music magazine every week
And I’m the one you seek when you need someone
To program your VCR!!
I can tell you anything that has to do with Yoda Vader and jar-jar
I Am geek! Here me roarr!!

And prepare yourself to beam up scotty
because us geeks will not be ignored.
We are the Jedi, nerds, aliens, monsters.
We are geek-we live long and prosper-

Damnit Jim! I am a doctor!
Not the mediocracy of men. Which is what the words of Dr. Mckoy
should always have been. For I will not submit or give in.
I am geek!..I know who I am..do you?




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Hey Ray! I'm octocoffee, and I thought I'd say a little something about your poem. So I'll start with the nitpicking, because I really can't leave any piece without nitpicking.

I am a geek.
I can apply the force to any situation-
I’m prone to massive humiliation


I think the last line really breaks rhythm. It sounds awkward when read out loud. I don't know exactly why it doesn't work, but I'm thinking it might be a little short. Oh, and perhaps you'd like to capitalize 'Force'? It emphasizes the whole Star Wars thing.

I Am geek!
I subscribe to music magazine every week
And I’m the one you seek when you need someone
To program your VCR!!
I can tell you anything that has to do with Yoda Vader and jar-jar
I Am geek! Here me roarr!!


I feel like the rhythm here is a bit lackadaisical. Your very cute rhymes will show up better when there's a consistent pattern to the lines, but right now they are lost. Here's my take, but it's just rough to show you rhythm. It's not very good, but if you read it out loud you'll see that it's got that sort of sing-song found in poetry.

"I am Geek!
I subscribe to Wired every week,
Yes, I'm the one you'll seek
to program that pesky VCR,
or talk of Yoda, Vader, and Jar-Jar,
because I am Geek! Hear me roar!"

And prepare yourself to beam up scotty
because us geeks will not be ignored.
We are the Jedi, nerds, aliens, monsters.
We are geek-we live long and prosper-


This stanza has better flow, and it reads better than the previous ones. However, I'm just curious as to whether you're using rhyming intermittently or if you plan to use it throughout the entire poem, because it disappears here.

Damnit Jim! I am a doctor!
Not the mediocracy of men. Which is what the words of Dr. Mckoy
should always have been. For I will not submit or give in.
I am geek!..I know who I am..do you?


‘Mediocracy’ isn’t a word, I’m pretty sure. Did you mean ‘mediocrity’? The segment “which is what the words of Dr. [it’s McCoy, not McKoy, right?] should always have been” sounds awkward. Did you want that to be the second line, to keep in with the ‘men’ and ‘in’? If so, it’s awfully long and seems strange. However, I absolutely adore the last line, it’s very nice.

Overall, I do adore this poem. Geeks are the best, for sure. It’s witty and funny, full of those classic geek-only references. You really just need to work on the rhythm, so this poem really captures the attention of the reader and sends a strong/catchy image. Nice work, I really liked it!

Best of luck
octo
...if you are going to step on a live mine, make it your own. Be blown up, as it were, by your own delights and despairs. ~ Ray Bradbury
I Review Everything!




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Hello, Geek. Interesting poem.

I Am Geeek
Please stick to standard spellings. My apologies if this is a typo.

I am a geek.

I can apply the force to any situation-

I’m prone to massive humiliation
Why is the "I" in italics? I think that is an awkward way to begin a poem. I got tripped up and had to reread it. I also noticed that in the rest of the poem you said "I am geek," so I would take out the "a" here, for continuity's sake. I like the next two lines, but I think the dash is out of place. A comma would work better. And you need some form of punctuation after "humiliation". I would suggest a period.

I Am geek!

I subscribe to music magazine every week

And I’m the one you seek when you need someone

To program your VCR!!

I can tell you anything that has to do with Yoda Vader and jar-jar

I Am geek! Here me roarr!!
Why are is "am" capitalized? I don't think it adds anything & it's not proper grammar. Maybe capitalizing "geek" would have a good effect? You need punctuation after the second line. Either a comma or a period would work. In the third line, I'd suggest taking out the word "someone". It still makes sense and isn't such a mouthful. Also, the fifth line is a bit long. Here's my suggested rewrite: "I know everything about Yoda, Vader and Jar-Jar." And one last thing: I can't take you serious when you have double exclamation marks. I mean, I know this is a lighthearted poem, but really, one would suffice.

And prepare yourself to beam up scotty

because us geeks will not be ignored.

We are the Jedi, nerds, aliens, monsters.

We are geek-we live long and prosper-
I love the first two lines here. You need a comma after "up", a comma after "Scotty", and make sure to capitalize your proper name. In the last line, I'd make the dash after "prosper" a period.

Damnit Jim! I am a doctor!

Not the mediocracy of men. Which is what the words of Dr. Mckoy

should always have been. For I will not submit or give in.

I am geek!..I know who I am..do you?
I had to look up this reference. "Mckoy" should be spelled "McCoy". I don't understand "not the mediocracy" part. "Mediocracy" isn't a word, either. Do you mean "mediocrity"? Are you saying the words of Dr. McCoy should always have been the mediocrity of men? That doesn't make sense. The ending is good, but what is with the double periods? Did you mean ellipses (...)? I think it would be better if, instead of the ellipses, you put each of those phrases on its own line.

Cute poem!
-Rachel
"He found his voice tended either to disappear or to come out too loud." -William Golding



constant state of confuzzle
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