I am too OCD to not point out all of the issues line-by-line. I sometimes don't do that, but those are rare occasions.
"He yanked himself free and fled to the kitchen where something huddled against the flooded windowpanes. It sighed and wept and tapped continually, and suddenly he was outside, staring in, the rain beating, the wind chilling him, and all the candle darkness inside lost."
