~Blue Mist~

Ok be kind lol, this is my first proper story and its still in the works

“Time is a companion that goes with us on a journey. It reminds us to cherish each moment, because it will never come again. What we leave behind is not as important as how we have lived.”
- Patrick Stewart


Preface
Funny how dreams can seem to be reality,
How it is a small spark of hope to me.
I’d say, for this random guy, I want to dream of him forever
I know I’ll never say goodbye to him, no, Never ever.


I watched on as the action unfolded. I promised I wouldn’t interfere with fate, but watching on the sideline, I was having second thoughts. This wasn’t going to end the way he had planned it, and he knew it. It was torture watching his heart being torn apart piece by piece. And, I couldn’t do anything but look on.
This is what he had intended, no matter how much I wanted to run to him and put back the pieces. I had promised because I love him. I can’t break promises, no matter how much I wanted to. I didn’t want to watch, but my eyes wouldn’t turn away from him. My feet wouldn’t walk away. My body didn’t want to correspond with my brain, neither did my heart.
I was just managing to keep it together. If I said anything, I wouldn’t be able to stop. I could barely breathe; it hurt every time I inhaled air because he couldn’t breathe. It hurt every time I blinked because each time, he would be lost from my sight. I had to stop it, but would he ever forgive me? This is what he wanted, and I would do nothing to stop him getting what he wants. He was the reason why I lived. Regardless if I gave him what he wants, it will tear me apart to.
Saying good-bye is the hardest thing to do. But losing the chance is even worse.

1. A New Beginning

I watched the seconds slowly tick past on my watch; they were teasing me; driving me insane. It was reasonable though. That’s what time was designed to do. I had precisely two minutes until we left Victoria’s boarder and entered New South Wales with my mother, Nicole.

It wasn’t such a big deal! I was only moving interstate with her. This meant new town, new school, new friends, new everything. Why was I making such a big deal about moving to Eden? Honestly, I hate the word new. I had lived with my dad since my parents divorced, but stupid new guardianship laws had to change since I am nearly sixteen.

My mum could always turn around; of course I had no hope in convincing her. I had already tried. I even got my friends to protest with me, but she didn’t give in. She did compliment us though on the signs we made. A bit over the top, I know but it was worth a shot.

My mother was beautiful, perfect complexion, big blue eyes, and beautiful medium-length golden-brown hair that had a gentle curl at the ends. Me on the other hand, well, I had inherited my dad’s looks. You wouldn’t even guess I was my mother’s kid. I had dark long chocolate brown hair which looked unnatural; it was wavy and gradually became curly at the ends, which I couldn’t seem to tame. I was slightly shorter then everyone which irritated me, especially when I had to build up my courage to ask for help trying to get something off a high shelf.

I wasn’t stick thin or tubby, but I could do with some more exercise. My eyes were a weird hazel that would change. One day they would be bright vivid green and another, they would be a murky chocolate brown. Or they would just float in between. That was probably the only interesting thing I liked about my looks. Other than that, I was average, and that’s all I would ever be.

“Look Sophie, we are about to come into New South Wales!” Mum smiled, pointing to a sign that said NOW LEAVING VICTORIA.

Even signs had to rub it in. I had to now stay with my Mum because my Dad can’t support me financially anymore. He’s getting remarried though, but to some chick that only cares about money. Well she can’t rely on Dad for that. If it wasn’t for his past drug problem where he had blown all of it, I wouldn’t be on my way to Eden.

I got a text message from my older sister Bridget. She wasn’t affected by stupid custody laws. And she had inherited our mum’s looks. Lucky her, not that my dad was hideous or anything, he was average, like me. Well he used to be because the drugs don’t help.

Bridget was living with her boyfriend in Sydney. I had met him only once before, when they came down to Eden to visit Mum. I was visiting for the holidays. I barely knew Mum’s friends or anyone at Eden. I hadn’t been at Mum’s often enough to meet anyone.

I opened the message: Hey beautiful, how are you? Say hi 2 mum for me. I’ll call you soon xxx.It was official; I even felt a sudden change in the atmosphere. We had now entered a different territory. I hadn’t truly cared when I was just visiting, but I was now living in Eden. We sat in silence for pretty much the rest of the trip. There was an invisible barrier I had formed around myself that Mum wouldn’t dare penetrate.

I had shut myself from her, locked my emotions and love away. And, she probably just assumed it was me being a ferrel teenager, but out of both my sister and I, I have always been the less-loved one, always been ignored by both my parents.

I felt a new sudden hatred for her taking me away. It had just washed over me, but I wouldn’t try to stop it. I agreed with it, adding if possible more antagonism towards my mother. She kept snatching glimpses, smiling her beautiful flawless smile. I just ignored her and continued staring out the window.
Parents, they try to make you think, that they’re the greatest people in the world. Mum hadn’t proven that yet. My life was over, all I wanted was to be with my Dad in his warm arms, telling me that I was his angel and telling me how much he loved me. I would pay any price; I wouldn’t even care if I had to be there through all his dark hours.

I could put up with those nightmares as long as I woke up to see him first thing in the morning. Drinking his coffee and reading the daily newspaper. Maybe that’s why he gave me the time-of-day, because I was always left to pick up the pieces of my shattered family.

Lisa wouldn’t help him like I did. Dad needed me; I was the only one who knew how to help him. Neither of us was going to survive without each other, metaphorically speaking.
I recognised where we were, we were quickly approaching Eden. I remembered the not so familiar town briefly, the dark green trees that lined along the horizon, the calm waves rolling onto the beach. An even balance of both the country and city— as Mum turned down a road that entered the forest. Mum lived in an open field surrounded by six other houses and more forest.

Mum’s house was an old 1960’s two-storey white house: some of the wooden planks off the walls were peeling back and the paint was a little chipped. Her garden was a little crazy, with different flowers and trees growing everywhere plus, the grass needed to be mowed. I was now going to be afraid of being bitten by a snake.
As soon as she had pulled up, I was out of the car, waiting impatiently to get my bags out of the boot. She helped me carry my bags and other belongings to my room. I didn’t own much. I was still hoping to be turned around and heading back to my Dad’s.
The house looked as if it hadn’t been touched since I was last here. This was lucky because Mum had my whole room rearranged, and I had everything I had always wanted. I had a new desk... that wasn’t falling apart and needed old phone books to keep it together. I had Mum’s old computer, which would be very useful for homework and talking to my friends. And I had an actual bed which was better than my old lumpy mattress that sat on the floor at my Dad’s.

“It’s not much-”
“Mum, it’s more than enough. Thanks.”

She was shocked at me talking to her again, but then she closed my door and let me unpack by myself. She knew what my room was like at home. But that’s only because that’s all Dad could afford after his drug addiction. I began to unpack, putting my clothes in the draws, my photos on the window sill and desk. I posted up my few posters on the wall opposite my bed, and got out my few books that I had managed to jut fit into my backpack. Dad said he would send some more stuff up next week so it would feel a little more like home.

It didn’t take me long to unpack so I sat on my bed and rang Dad. Unfortunately, Lisa picked up.

“Why are you answering Dad’s phone?” I asked straight out. I sounded rude but I didn’t care.
“Because he‘s busy. I don’t have time to waste so; I’ll tell him you love him-”She did a cruel impersonation of me.
“Tell him I rang!”
“Whatever.” She hung up.

I squeezed my phone, imagining it was her. She hated me and didn’t bother to hide it. Yet, she was my best friend in front of Dad. I didn’t tell him about it though, because it was nice to see Dad happy again. And unfortunately, his happiness came in the form of Lisa. I went to bed earlier then I planned. There was nothing better to do.

“Life could be worse,” I thought aloud.
“I could be beaten or teased, or starving, or homeless. I think I have it pretty damn good,” I continued. I reached in my pocket for my iPod, which I had completely forgotten about. I shoved the headphones into my ears, scrolled to the play list entitled ‘Rock,’ and put it on repeat. Rock music was just what I need right now. Especially because on top of being angry and annoyed right now; I was also feeling anxious.

I didn’t get much sleep, even when I had finished debating on how long I would stay here. The rain on my window was irritating, making unnecessary noise. I pulled my blankets up to my chin and even covered my ears with my pillow. I kept tossing and turning all night. I couldn’t get comfortable; I was so use to my old bed, that I had gotten use to my back being sore in the morning. I managed to get a few hours sleep before I woke up again.