poetry A-B-S-T-A-I-N

A-B-S-T-A-I-N

For the timeless A-Adversities that I will not A-Allow myself to succumb to
Never A-Allowing a loophole whereby my pristine life may become A-Adulterated

B-Because I am too powerful to permit any B-Bale to get the B-the Better of me
Cuz I want the B-the Bed that i have to lie on tomorrow to B-Be comfortable

This means never S-Straying from my purpose which is to preserve the S-Sacred being that God loan to me
No S-Suffering at the hands of demons that thirst for the S-Savouring S-Scent of my S-Sweet Soul
But its not only S-Sex you know...

It’s all the T-the Temptations and the T-the Troubles that T-Traverse my life
All the T-The Things that i shall never Par-T-ake of

but why you may ask?

Because I have A-Aspirations to be the best me that I can be
so I choose to live A-Above my weaknesses and A-Above the immoral pleasures of this world
because I want my A-Afterimage to be as beautiful as the midnight sun

So I- I will be I-intelligent, I- Insightful, I-in tune with my surroundings

I- I will N-Never give up, N-Never give in
cuz i have to N-Narrate my Success story to all you N-Narrow minded people who say its too hard to A-B-S-T-A-I-N

I think this is clever, and I think I can see what you're writing to do with it, but for me the presentation is awkward. The A- B- S-'s etc. before each relevant word is making me read it with a stutter. Is that deliberate? I like that each stanza represents a different letter of the word abstain, although you have 'but why you may ask?' stuck in the middle of it all, which looks a bit out of place. I'd try to incorporate that into one of the other stanzas so that it doesn't break up the poem.

I think the stanza following the Ts was the strongest part of the poem. I think the last line is very effective as well, though I would consider breaking it up into two parts. I would just go back and look at how the piece is set out on the page - maybe rather than repeating the capital letters, just bold them so they stand out that way? That might look really good, actually. It's a promising idea and I hope my rambling comments help somehow, haha.

Oh, and welcome to the site! Don't forget that you need to review 2 pieces for every 1 you submit.