Freestyle,Rap

1.Ye I'm Enjoyin da young writers
2.U know I'm a young rider
3.I got dat California LUV
4.But when I'm on da street ma homie ain't call me no rider.
5.They call me a YOUNG THUG!!
6.Homies go fo ballin
7.Niggas know I'm Rollin
8.Niggas tryna trip me,but bitch I ain't fallin.
9.Got ma guns cocked up
10.Get a fuckin hole in yo chest,and get yo ass locked up.
11.I smoke weed every day
12.Get into political shit like McCain
13.Be on da top of da billboard,and sell cocaine every day! (Ha ha)
14.But nigga ain't dat funny
15.Cuz niggas want war
16.But bitches aint got money.
17.Niggas want act like bitches but I keep their ass runnin.
18.With ma homeboy
19.All ya niggas see me thuggin.
20.Niggas wanna get their ass blowed
21.Get their ass throwed up
22.Cuz bitch u gotta low-ride
23.When u hear it for the fuckin west coast
24.lemme see yo with yo full height(Yeea)

Mod edit: Rated R for language.

Nice man! I liked it. But lots of people around here will maybe get offended but I don't give. I disagree with some stuff that you wrote about weed and MCcain but I still liked it. Because if you would really be a rap artist People would like this. I give you a star!

hmmm....

sssss.....you certainelay have a lot of spunk.....

but I feel that you can be saying more....

Most rappers suck because they rap about themselves and things they don't have and don't need....

they waste their own time as well as the time of the listeners....

a song about something you don't agree is ok but you gotta make sure your song is set like an argument insead of a blind insult....

their are greater subjects that a rapper needs to touch on in order to be truly unique....

skill, wit, wisdom, forsight, insight and real soul...

and last time I checked the best rappers didn't speak broken english...and maybe you shouldn't cuss....the best rappers can truly get somewhere when they can inspire a child

I really want you to succeed...because if you succeed I succeed...

I can probably hand you couple lyrics sometime....

HOLLA!!!

I'm not that big a fan of rap music. However, unlike some rappers I've heard out there, this actually seems well written in comparison. There seems to be something missing, though. What that something is, I don't know. Maybe an underlying message, or perhaps a little more to say (those 24 lines might take 44 seconds to say).

It doesn't matter anyways. You write what you want to, and I'm not going to stand in your way. Keep writing and maybe you'll hit big time.