Perfection

Perfection


Everybody thinks I'm perfect
But I know I'm not
And when everyone starts to find out about me
I suddenly feel as if they forgot
Exactly what I'm like
And how I feel inside

When I start to feel so bad
You always come around
You're the only one who knows I'm not perfect
And only you can keep my feet on the ground

I feel as if I've known you all my life
Although we've recently just met
You're the only one who knows I'm not perfect
And we'll prove it to everyone, but not just yet.

I think this was a very nice, simple poem. And I enjoyed reading it thoroughly. The only thing I think might need a bit of correction is:

You're the only one who knows I'm not perfect

And we'll prove it to everyone, but not just yet.

I think the last part should be changed around a bit like this:

And we'll prove it to everyone, but just not yet.

Other than that I loved this, you get a gold star ^_^

Yeah, I think that's a really good idea. I was just writing it from memory, so I was really surprised there wasn't more than that wrong! Thanks again.

You want to know something weird. I wrote and posted a poem called Perfection. And, it's about the same exact thing.
Weird, right?
I liked it though. Good job and gold star!

I feel as if I've known you all my life
Although we've recently just met
You're the only one who knows I'm not perfect
And we'll prove it to everyone, but not just yet.

I love that part the most.
Also, how many times have I told you about those reviews!!! Gosh Em.

I am actually not a fan of this poem, it's line after line navel gazing and to be honest by the end the only thoughts going through my mind were, "why should I care?"

You go from "People think I am perfect." to "But you make it all better!" and I am still stuck with the thoughs "why should I care?"

The rhythem changes in every stanza, the first has no rhyme scheme at all, the second and third are both ABCB. If you are going to have a rhythem or rhyme scheme it is important to keep it consistant throughout the whole piece.

The other thing that really bothers me is the repeated word "perfect" after the second time, I was like... find a new word.

I see where you were trying to go here, but I really feel this would be better left in a diary/blog.

Best of luck

OverEasy

In poem format, its alright written. The stanza's would make more sense if they were the same amount of lines and such.

In all honesty, and no this isnt supposed to be a hit towards you writing or anything, i just didnt find this a very enjoyable poem. It seems like you being just a little bit conceited when it comes to other peoples views of you. No one tends to think another human being perfect especially yourself.

By saying that everyone else thinks your perfect doesnt that in itself make you the assumer? Just my opinion of course.

of course dont let this one bad review stop you from doing poetry. Just because i didnt enjoy or relate to the poem doesnt mean someone else wont.

if you have any question about what i said feel free to PM me. i may not be incredibly knowledgeable on the topic of poetry but i do understand what is enjoyable to read and what isnt.