good to be

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take a look,
take a look,
i got the skill
to write a book

i've climbed a fence
i've biked a few miles
i've aced a test
every once and a while

i've sung a few songs,
i've climbed a tree
my oh my
it's good to be

i've kissed a frog,
i've seen a deer
i've seen a monkey
drink a beer

i've drank a soda
i've shot a bird
i used to know
the longest word

my lifes been good
cant you see
my oh my
its good to be
yeah the sun may brighten your day, but if i had my way, I'd take the rain

He gave her 12 roses. 11 real and one fake. Then he said "I'll love you till the last rose dies"




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Reviews 312
Hey hobbes. I get to critique your poem.

I loved it. It's funny and original (a refreshing break from the depression poems we seem to get all the time) so all I have to offer are grammar things:
1)Capitalization is your friend. :) It doesn't have to be at every new line, but you should capitalize the I's and wherever else it makes sense.
2)You omitted an apostrophe a couple times in the last stanza (the first and fourth lines).
3)The second-to-last stanza (I've drank a soda...) seemed really random-the things in the other stanzas seemed to fit together mostly, but this was just like, soda! bird! language! It just didn't work.

i've seen a monkey

drink a beer

I laughed out loud when I read this.
'life tastes sweeter when it's wrapped in poetry'
-the wombats


critiques // nano




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Great! I love the happy-go-lucky Huck Finn style narrative. The stanzas are pleasantly irrelevant, flow well, and are a pleasure to read. Don't worry about the capitalization. Have you read any e.e. cummings? He never capitalized anything. Personally, I like the lower case style and wouldn't change it.

i've kissed a frog,
i've seen a deer
i've seen a monkey
drink a beer

i've drank a soda
i've shot a bird
i used to know
the longest word


Love these stanzas, but can you do something more original than kissing a frog? Maybe kissing the monkey or the deer and eating the frog... something... The transition between beer and soda is great. I especially love the "longest word" line.

Overall, nice poem.
"Hey look! A black shooting star!"

"That's no star...that's Fangala!"




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 95
*ahem*
Capitalization, please?
^^They said don't change it...I don't know if you meant it as a style or just not bothering. If it was a style, go ahead and keep it, if not, I guess you could just say it was.

This was funny.
I liked it.
I thought you were going to shove in something in about chuggin' a half-baby.
Haha.
Nice job.
Short, sweet and to the point. I wouldn't exactly say it's extremely memorable, but good none the less.

-Jocelyn.
"The difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug." -Mark Twain



This looks like a really bad episode of Green Acres.
— David Letterman