He Sits By The Fire

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Points 890
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He sits by the fire
With a blanket across his lap,
A cup of steaming coffee in his hands.
On his feet are his favorite worn leather shoes,
Given to him for Christmas by her,
The last one that she was with him.

The tired brown dog sits beside him,
As he stares blankly into the fire.
His eyes rise to the mantle, to the picture of her.
The well-worn book is set down in his lap.
The dog moves over and rests its head on his shoes
While he flips his wedding ring in his hands.

His wife walks in and takes his hands,
Then pulls her favorite chair over next to him.
She wriggles her toes about, free from their shoes.
He gets up from his chair to tend to the fire,
And as soon as he sits the dog jumps up in his lap.

He turns to his wife and says to her,
While pointing to the picture with his hands,
‘Remember when she would sit in my lap?’
His wife turns herself and faces him
To say and take a break from the fire,
‘Remember the day she ruined her new shoes?’

He says in reply ‘you got so angry about those shoes.
You were the one who bought them for her.’
Then he tosses a scrap of newspaper into the fire
And wipes the ink off of his hands.
A shadow falls through the window and onto him,
And the dog jumps to the hearth from his lap.

He folds his wrinkled intelligent hands into his lap
Then reaches down to tie his shoes.
He takes his wife’s hands and she looks at him,
And he looks at her,
Until they take each other’s hands,
And stare together into the fire.

The dog gets up to lap at the food by her
Feet without shoes that fell from her hands.
Laughing, she tells him to go fix the fire.




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Gender Female
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Given to him for Christmas by her,

The last one that she was with him.
Alittle grammar problems.

Other then that everything is going okay. You're doing really good.
Life is what's left when everything is taken from you.




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 86
Thanks.And I know those are a bit messed up, but i had to follow a format putting certain repeated words in a specific place.
Who did the jedi mind trick on you women when it comes to capri pants? *waves hand* You want a piece of clothing that makes your ass look wider, your legs shorter, and your feet bigger.
-Christopher Titus




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I think it is cute. Very good. :D
This is a story about a girl
Who cried a river and drowned the whole world.

In every single letter. In every single word. There will be a hidden message about a boy who loves a girl.




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XavierJohnson123
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I really enjoyed your poem. It was sweet and simple. You told a story and you told it well. I liked how I received that cozy warm feeling, of heat and passion. I enjoyed the intimacy that the wife and husband shared between the two of them, while thinking about the pain of the past. I kept seeing the fire for some reason. I envisioned the cup of coffee being so hot that the steam flowed freely to the ceiling. I just wish that you could embellish a little more about what the dad felt, the pain that had been tormenting him because of the death of his daughter. I wanted the husband and the wife to connect more and share their feelings with each other. This would have been so much more in depth and would have strengthen your poem and added a sense of passion and yearning.

I wanted to feel the pain of the dad and mom. I wanted the dog to sense the pain of his master and whimper at the intensity that fills the room. I wanted all the characters to get lost in themselves and each other. Good poem though! Keep writing!



Ghosts, demons, and ghouls cannot scare the cat's underling.
— TheMulticoloredCyr