Big Black Bug Tongue Twister :P

A big black bad bug

bleeds black blood

from its bladder and it shudders

when it waddles to it's 'mudder'

and it's name is Adder

and it gets more badder

when it walks under a ladder

every minute

when it wins it

competition that it's in it

and it gets more sadder

when it's surname is Radder

every second

when it beckoned

to the one that it reckoned

and it lives in Streatham

while it travels to Peckham

every hour

when it showers

in a bath full of flour

and it wears its crown

and goes deep down

every day

when it says,

"Go to Cresent Moon Bay,"

it's an athropod

and it uses petards

every week

when it sneaks

to the top of the peak.

That is the story of the big back bug

Now make sure you don't take drugs.

I have to say, I think the ending is rather cute! But for a poem, it's really...hmmm lacking. I don't exactly consider tongue twisters to be poetry. They're fun with language, but not something I'd read in a book and think, "Wow, I'm glad I read that!" unless the poem was just filled with alliterations because it's like that. Er. Does that make sense?

So I don't really know if this is exactly a poem, but in any case. If you want to write a good tongue twister, here are some suggestions:

1. Make sense! As far as I can tell, that whole entire thing is one sentence. Why not use punctuation throughout? Also, you use words that don't exist ("Badder") for the sake of rhyme - this is a no-no in everything you do.

2. Tell an actual story. If you read other tongue twisters, they tend to be stories of some kind. This is why writing them is so hard - but so fun. You can't just say a lot of things that sound alike and call is a tongue twister! Squeeze your brain, try real hard, and tell a story! Here's a good example:

Betty Botter bought a bit of butter.
The butter Betty Botter bought was a bit bitter
And made her batter bitter.
But a bit of better butter
Makes batter better.
So Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter,
Making Betty Botter's bitter batter better.

Of course, like I said before, most tongue twisters don't get to the literary level of a poem - they're just for fun. ^_~ But fun is still a good thing!

So, with that note, I'm going to move this to other. I hope I helped, and good luck on your next tongue twister!

This was pretty cute, and I think you were just going for a little funny verse, so good job!