An Ode to Evolution

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My first go at a sonnet here Alexandrian structure, with English scan - 12 lines, 10beats (half rhymes/rhymes on every other line)
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If evolution be false -
a malice affront to god almighty.
Then tell me how and why for so, it is,
that it's preachers get off so lightly.
A man from ape, and ape from fish in sea,
is offensive to ears lacking melody.
Not like the true word cast in hallowed print-
man from clay and dust bound thus' merrily.
For this sense, by will of god our maker,
thus the root of pain and woe verily.
I pray Thea look, we've found set in earth -
Yon' truth and law to mankind's birth.




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Points 762
Reviews 64
Uh, I thought Alexandrian poems had 12 syllables....but, if you say so. The beats are a bit off. Trust me, I counted.

If evolution be false - (7)

a malice affront to god almighty. (10)

Then tell me how and why for so, it is, (10)

that it's preachers get off so lightly. (9)

A man from ape, and ape from fish in sea, (10)

is offensive to ears lacking melody. (11)

Not like the true word cast in hallowed print- (10)

man from clay and dust bound thus' merrily. (10)

For this sense, by will of god our maker, (10)

thus the root of pain and woe verily. (10)

I pray Thea look, we've found set in earth - (11)

Yon' truth and law to mankind's birth. (8)

7/12 were on the money though. I don't know if you can let that slide because I'm familiar in the style, but I thought I should just let you know, eh?

Personally, I think for trying out the style it's pretty nifty. I liked the idea a lot, but I don't think this really can be construed as an "Ode."



I know history. There are many names in history, but none of them are ours.
— Richard Siken