Living

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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 6
The colours swirling in the fake mist at our feet,
Our hearts beating in time to the music,
Busting out some funny move for the rest to see,
To dance like you want, is living.

Some back flips and side-to-side twirls,
A hop and a jump for the sky,
A tumble here and a dip over there,
Playing like you want, is living.

A love dies and a heart breaks,
Love blossoms between two who can't be,
A smack to the face for foolishness,
Acting and performing like you want, is living.

You give it your best try and you excel,
You stall and you fall behind,
You go for the plunge of a lifetime,
How you choose your life, is living.
Last edited by white desert on Fri May 30, 2008 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.




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Gender Male
Points 3925
Reviews 160
The second and third stanzas cracked me up...they remind me of when I used to be a kid..nice work. I really don't see anything that absolutely needs to be corrected. Perhaps someone else will see something, but this was decent.
I'm advertising here: Rosetta...A Determinism of Morality...out May 25th...2010 album of the year, without question.




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 34
It was good...can't think of any improvements. It was lovely to read and well written




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Gender Male
Points 1416
Reviews 101
Awesome, but i agree with them... absolutely. not a thing i would change.
Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive



You got rid of them. Yes, that's just like you. Getting rid of everything unpleasant instead of learning to put up with it.
— Aldous Huxley, Brave New World