Imperfect World

[pre]Imperfect World

We all want to be special
But we’re not.
We all want to succeed
But we won’t

And we all want
Everything we can’t have
And we don’t
Give
A
Damn
About the rest of the world.

We all want to stand out
But we can’t because some
of us are just ordinary people
With ordinary parents
And ordinary
Siblings
Or as ordinary as siblings get
And the only thing
We have
Is our ordinariness
But does that make us extraordinary?

We all need the same things
It would be easier if we didn’t
We all want what is best
For ourselves and our children
But what about the other children,
those children,
the ones starving in India,
and dying in Sudan

We all want to save the world
So nobody will, because dreaming is believing is NOT doing
We all want to stop Global Warming in it’s tracks
But nobody does because it’s too hard or they’ll
do it later or right now, they have to focus
on their crappy,
rich,
Hummer-filled
lives.


And we are all
preoccupied
with our
crappy,
rich,
richer than those starving kids in India
Hummer-filled
lives
and there is a piece in our
brains or their hearts
or i don't know where
that is telling us
We are all heroes in our own special way!

Sure. Fine. Fabulous! We are all heroes.
Everybody’s a hero!! Woo hoo! Don’t you love
being a hero? Oh ya! Wait, you kill puppies?
Ya, well, then you’re not a hero, but that
guy over there picked up a can so he’s a hero!


[/pre

Hello, me again.
This is your poem:

abbisnail wrote:[pre]Imperfect World

We all want to be special
But we’re not.

Now, Your font is already hard to read, but with this slanted, it is very hard.

We all want to succeed
But we won’t

And we all want IS,
Everything we can’t have
And we don’t
Give
A
Damn

Maybe instead of each word have it's own line, put like this:
And we don't
Give...a...damn
or bold it. Be creative.

About the rest of the world.

We all want to stand out
But we can’t because some
of us are just ordinary people

Again, that terriable slant

With ordinary parents
And ordinary
Siblings

Why did you put siblings on it's own line? You don't need to do that.

Or as ordinary as siblings get
And the only thing
We have
Is our ordinariness
But does that make us extraordinary?

We all need the same things
It would be easier if we didn’t
We all want what is best
For ourselves and our children
But what about the other children,
those children,
the ones starving in India, and dying in Sudan
We all want to save the world
So nobody will, because dreaming is believing is NOT doing
We all want to stop Global Warming in it’s tracks
But nobody does because it’s too hard or they’ll do it later or right now, they have to focus on their work, kids, marriage, divorce, boyfriend, girlfriend, blind date, chores, homework, exercise and so
much
more.

I like the end part. Maybe though, you could make this part smaller, break it up a little.


And, nobody realizes
They’re too busy, preoccupied
That they are NOT the only ones
And they need to step up NOW
And together we can…[/pre]

I kinda thought that that was going to be your ending. I like how you didn't finish the sentence at the end.

Even though I love the ending, it is very unarignal.

I hope that this helped!
Happy writing, I wish you luck,

-- M.B.Author

I really enjoyed reading this poem. I liked the part that you talked about dreaming about making a change yet, never getting around to doing so. I have a saying. "Why dream if you are not going to make your dreams come true?"