Umbrella

6 posts

What do you think?

Yes
3
75%
No
1
25%
 
Total votes : 4


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Umbrella
By Summer

Verse 1
He said " You can have everything"
From shiny cars to diamond rings
He said I'd be his queen
And that I deserved a limousine
I thought he was my king
The boy in my dreams
But he was never there
And I didn't care

Chorus 1
Because he can do and say whatever
But I won't sick in this stormy weather
And he can call but I won't answer
I don't need his money or his umbrella
ella ella eh eh eh
I don't need his umbrella
ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh

Verse 2

He came and bought my heart
He tore my whole world apart
And turned it into pain
So now I'm in the rain
But now everything is Crystal clear
I realized he didn't care
He tried to make my heart hurt
But it didn't work

Chorus 1

Verse 3

I thought we were a team
The perfect couple in a magazine
but I realized that this relationship was a fake
I was dreamin when I was awake
That's why I didn't realize it was pourin rain
I guess I was just too scared to feel the pain
He thought he come and go
That's I'm a let him know
That I'm not his cinderella
So when I won't leave a glass slippa slippa
I won't leave a glass slippa slippa slippa eh eh eh eh eh eh

Chorus 2

I won't rush into his arms
I'm a pack my bags, I'm gone
I'm leavin' him
I'm not gonna act like I needed him no more

Chorus 1

Musical break: 2 measures


Chorus 3
Ooh baby I'm leavin' leavin'
Ooh baby I'm leavin' leavin'
I'm not gonna act like I needed no more

The End




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is this supposed to be a spoof of of the song by Rihanna?

edit: lol, never mind. i guess you have to read the whole post, huh.

i liked this, good rhyme scheme and everything. i don't know the original song well enough to know if you followed it perfectly, but i liked it.
“We’re still here,” he says, his voice cold, his hands shaking. “We know how to be invisible, how to play dead. But at the end of the day, we are still here.” ~Dax

Teacher: "What do we do with adjectives in Spanish?"
S: "We eat them!"




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But I won't sick in this stormy weather


Did you mean "I won't stick" or "I'm sick" ? Or did you actually mean "I won't sick"?

I as well am not sure whether or not this is meant to be based on Rhianna's song (spoof or otherwise). The meanings are completely different, but then there's the "umbrella/ ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh" part, which is directly from that song. And then lines like this: "I thought we were a team/ The perfect couple in a magazine" are so close (original: "and we'll never be world apart/ Maybe in magazines"), maybe not so much in the meaning, but in the words.

Mm, then the last three lines, I'm going to assume this song was based off of that one.

Either way, the rhythm and words are solid, but in both cases, there isn't much that's new here.

[Also, polls at the top of literary things (though, I suppose this isn't so literary, but it's along the same lines...) aren't... very professional]




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Well, I'm no great judge of lyrics, in fact, I'm no judge of lyrics at all. I couldn't write poetry if my life depended on it. XD But this sounds really good to me. I like the way it's written and the rhyme scheme. The chorus, especially, is really good.

Sorry, I know this is kind of a poor review. XD Like I said, I'm certainly not a poet, and lyrics aren't really my element. Besides, I don't think I've ever heard the original song. (I'm not familiar with a lot of music, well known or otherwise.) So all I can say is that it sounds great to me!
"The world is not beautiful, therefore, it is." --Kino's Journey

Hey, how about a free review?




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Hmm, a take on Rhianna's song hm?

It was okay but I didn't much like the idea of chaning the lyrics. Song writing should be there so you can find your own rhythm and such.

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Unfortunately I was just singing Jingle Bells and I haven't listened to this song for ages so the tune in my head was so wrong, but it was really funny all the same. I can't stand this song so it's good to see a nice parody of it.
*Don't expect to see me around much in the next couple of weeks. School has started again, and it'll be a couple of weeks before I've settled in. If you've asked me for a critique, you will get it, but not for a little while. Sorry*



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