Break Up or Make Up?

>I wrote this for music, when we were looking at pop songs. Tell me what you think. Personally I was quite proud of it! (But obviously it's not perfect so any crits - no matter how cruel - would be apreciated) Bkwrm

Break Up or Make Up?

Chorus
Sometimes we’re good.
Sometimes we’re fine.
Sometimes you love me.
Sometimes you’re mine.
But then we break up
and we make up.
I just wanna know – what
is it gonna be this time?

Verse #1
We first met on the dance floor.
We both knew what we were lookin’ for.
I caught your eye; you came over to me
and we both knew we were meant to be.
It was so natural, it was like a dream –
you an’ me together were the perfect team.
I thought you loved me like I love you.
I should have known it was too good to be true.

Chorus

Verse #2
I caught a girl with my guy –
I thought I was gonna die.
Just lie that; like 1,2,3
and hate became our new reality.
You said you didn’t want me no more.
I left then –I slammed the door.
We were over, we were through
and I knew it had been too good to be true.

Chorus

Verse #3
We met again one night by chance.
We were back together by the end of the dance.
You’ve left me loads of times again
and I wake up still feelin’ the pain.
Now though we still argue constantly,
I always come back when you say you love me
and when we fight and say we’re through
I just remember that our love is true.

Chorus #2
We’re not always good.
We’re not always fine.
You don’t always love me.
You’re not always mine.
But when we break up
we always make up
and I know that you will
come back to me in time.

i like a lot of this, its easy to relate to and thats always good! some of it doesnt feel that genuine though? probably explained by the fact it was an assignment! but i can definitley imagine it as a pop song an a successful one too, so good on ya! X

again and pain don't really rhyme, and that threw it off. Also, some of the lines were clear-cut cliches, which really butchered it for me. And the chorus seems too simplistic.

I agree that it's rather simple and not the most original but as far as love songs go, it's nice. Work on the rhythm a little perhaps but in general it was good.

I would just like to say that I pronounce again 'a-gayn' not 'a-gen' and that's how it should be in the song. You'll notice that when pronounced that way it DOES rhyme with pain.
Bkwrm
(Probably a little late to post this now, but hey-ho!)

I agree that it is not unique and a little too cliché in some places, but I think all in all it's okay.
Anyway there are a few things I might change:

...– what
It’s gonna be this time.

You might want to make this into a question. It would make your chorus a little less simple and I think it would be good to speak directly to the "you" in this place. (just a suggestion)

and I knew it was too good to be true.

Maybe change this to "had been too good to be true" to state that it is over again and make more clear that the love had to good to be true and not the breaking up. (I know no one would get it wrong but you used "was too good to be true" in the first verse for the present, so perhaps "had been" would be better in this place.)

I hope this is a little help to you!

~Kalli

im not a huge fan of break up/make up songs, i can think of alot of them off the top of my head. this isnt bad tho. keep toying around with the lines depending on how the melody is, and it should be fine.

"You said you didn’t want me no more" ACK! the grammer! its not 'no more', it should be 'any more'. sorry but that totally murder of the english language just maimed me. i hate it when i listen to the radio and hear something like that, but besides that you should be alright.

Haha, I can totally hear this on the radio!

This is great, really. If this was poetry, the cliches would drive me up the wall, but seeing as this is a pop song, they just...well...work! I think you've really got this genre down. Nice work!

I know it should be 'any more', but that doesn't fit in with the rhythm, so 'no more' it will remain!
Bkwrm

I loved this song a lot, and even though it had some errors...So what!!! A song is from the heart, like poetry, so made up or misspelled words are okay. Also when I read this I could kind of hear the song in my mind, It would sound good on a radio.