To Compose an Epitaph

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Meep
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Mon Jul 30, 2007 11:37 pm
Meep says... · Mon Jul 30, 2007 11:37 pm
Always.
Even after all this time,
______Your way forward is clear.
We were talking of minds
______And my soul.

I shall never reveal the best of you.

If you're wondering why all of those lines sound familiar, it's because they're rearranged lines of dialogue from chapter thirty-three of Deathly Hallows. If you've read it, you know what chapter I'm talking about.
Last edited by Meep on Sun Jan 13, 2008 3:19 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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gyrfalcon
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Tue Jul 31, 2007 3:07 am
gyrfalcon says... · Tue Jul 31, 2007 3:07 am
...it's beautiful, darling. Truly. (crap, I might as well go withdrawl my entries right now....)
"In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function...We laugh at honour and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful." ~C.S. Lewis
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frenchpastry
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Tue Jul 31, 2007 3:52 am
frenchpastry says... · Tue Jul 31, 2007 3:52 am
Completely wonderful, and sadly romantic. ;) *Applause to you* for writing the best Snape poem, in my opinion, in the world.
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." ^_^
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thewonderworldofnight
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Tue Jul 31, 2007 5:49 pm
thewonderworldofnight says... · Tue Jul 31, 2007 5:49 pm
NOOOOO!!! SNAPE!!! DUMBLEDORE!!!

Like others said before me, it's beautiful in a sad way... :cry:
'"Many years ago, when I was young, I saw a fire, and what looked like death-- and beyond that, in the dark places, something...or some One, who knew me. Shall I at last find my way back to that wonderworld of Night?"'
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Poor Imp
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Tue Jul 31, 2007 11:16 pm
Poor Imp says... · Tue Jul 31, 2007 11:16 pm
Oy, the final remarks set up as a poem are more than clever. You've got double-meanings and depth in the best possible way. Brevity with thought - soul of wit, yes? In this case, poignancy.




The best of luck the The Snape contest.











IMP
ex umbris et imaginibus in veritatem

"There is adventure in simply being among those we love, and among the things we love -- and beauty, too."
-Lloyd Alexander
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Meep
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Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:01 pm
Meep says... · Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:01 pm
Thank you all. I really appreciate the feedback. (It's especially nice to hear that my poetry is all right, because I don't write it very often.)

Imp, d'you mind specifying the double meanings you saw? (I'm curious. I, er, didn't really plan this one out. Just sort of wrote it.)
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Rydia
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Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:16 pm
Rydia says... · Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:16 pm
Lol. Don't you love it when people read meaning in our poetry that we did not initially put there? This does feel really deep and I love that you've taken actual lines from the book. That's such a clever idea. The last line is perfect I think and so very fitting. In fact, I have no suggestions. The indention works, the separation of the last is effective and the lines themselves are great. The poem as a whole is rather vague which leaves it open to wide interpretation and the lines are so vague that double meanings are easily found. Very nice and the best of luck in the contest!
Writing Gooder

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whence
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Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:47 pm
whence says... · Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:47 pm
Way to scare everyone away from my contest :p
The good parts of a book may be only something a writer is lucky enough to overhear or it may be the wreck of his whole damn life — and one is as good as the other.
Ernest Hemingway
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Meep
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Sat Aug 04, 2007 6:25 pm
Meep says... · Sat Aug 04, 2007 6:25 pm
Kitty, that's my favorite part of writing. (S'funny; people never see the meanings I intend for them to see, they come up with other stuff instead.)

... and, er, sorry, whence. *meep*
✖ I'm sick, you're tired. Let's dance.
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That awkward moment when you jump out a window because your friend jumped out a window, then you remember that your other friend can fly.
— Rick Riordan, The Ship of the Dead