omg i hope i get it right this time...
OK, I'm new but I've written this totally mad play and I'd like to know what you all think...it contains a modified speech from Shakespeare and random words, i can do better but it just sets the scene for other plays that I've written...
The First Learning Opportunity
Third edition, revised, (like a maths test)
The scene is set in a scraggy history classroom in a state secondary school where a short but moderately thin female history teacher with obnoxious platinum blond hair(Miss E) is trying her best to teach a lesson full of rebellious kids, but failing miserably
Miss E: (in her annoying doll like voice) Now today, we are going to be studying the gunpowder plot
Kieran (a rebellious pupil): ( not even bothering to put up his hand) I don't understand the work Miss!
(Miss E lips grow thin, and in an attempt to change the subject she asks:)
Miss E: Where is the homework I shalt of set??
Kieran: I didn't understand it so i didn't do it Miss!
Miss E: ALACK!! LEARNING!!
(Miss E leaps onto desk)
Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close the wall up with our Homework dead!
In peace there’s nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility:
But when the blast of ink blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the writing;
Stiffen the fingers, summon up the blood,
Disguise fair nature with hard-favour’d thinking;
Then lend the paper a terrible aspect;
Let it pry through the portage of the head
Like the brass nib; let the brow o’erwhelm it
As fearfully as doth a galled rock
O’erhang and jutty his confounded base,
Swill’d with the wild and wasteful ocean.
Now set the teeth and stretch the pen wide,
Hold hard the breath, and bend up every spirit
To his full height! On, on, you noblest English Layabouts!
Whose blood is fet from fathers of war-proof History learning;
Fathers that, like so many Kierans,
Have in these parts from morn till even fought,
And sheath’d their swords for lack of learning.
Dishonour not your curriculum; now attest,
That those whom you call’d OFSTED did beget you.
Be copy now to men of grosser history,
And teach them how to learn. And you, good pupil,
Whose limbs were made in England, show us here
The mettle of your pasture; let us swear,
That you are worth your breeding; which I doubt ;
For there is none of you so disruptive and reluctant,
That hath not noble lustre in your pen.
I see you stand like greyhounds in the slips
Straining upon the start. The work's afoot:
Follow your sentence; and, upon this charge
Cry ‘God for Harry! England and Saint George!
WE SHALL AVENGE THE LOSS OF HOMEWORK!!!
(Miss E exits of the side door as the bell rings.)
(Speech from Shakespeare's Henry V , Act 3, scene 1,)
Please comment!!
lol brilliant learning opitunites rule don't dis them anybody or i'll get nate to hit you with a rolling pin quite hard as well