Dogs, I hate to say this but I am most likely withdrawing from the contest. I had some ideas but they were poorly thought out and I don't have time or creative energy to fix them. Looks like you've got some great entries so far, though!
"You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand." Leonardo Da Vinci
That awkward moment when you jump out a window because your friend jumped out a window, then you remember that your other friend can fly. — Rick Riordan, The Ship of the Dead