rip revised

It isn't that I don't find comfort in gasoline rainbows,

I heard that gasoline rainbows in some other poem.... yours or not, I am not sure....
I like this poem... it's such a lovely love-ish poem. Nothing more to really say, I am terrible at critiquing your work because it's always so much better than mine.

My favorite part was the first stanza.
Enough said.
Keep up the work man.

i thought this was beautiful. i love the images, mainly near the end...the first stanza was a bit forced, like a list, but i enjoyed it, nonetheless. please keep writing =]

This was wonderful. I liked the following lines:
“ And even when I am lost and there is nothing in this world
you will give me hope.

And my voice you will always hear.
And my hand you will always have.”


“I will be yours to keep.
I will be yours to treat
in whatever way you may want.
And even when there is nothing left,
not even in death,
I will remember you.”

I don’t think so there was a dash needed in between 'newly- sprouted'.

Good job.

-sayani.