A message to the world , stop hunting
dont move , mother firth said silently, the hunters . there here .
the baby chicks stopped there squbbles over a worm and froze .
I'll lead them some were else came the hushed whisper of there petrified mother,
not for her life but the life of her three babies.
one minute later;
the sparrow exploded out of the tree
it did not stop to look down
but still the hunter was too fast
the sparrow fell ,its body never was found.
the hunter went home that night , just intime for tea. not the slightest guilt for killing a mother . a mother of three.
ok , i know this poem is realy wierd and cant realy be called a poem , but just act like its a poem
oh and by the way i changed it since the first review was written so what 'thegirlwhofateloves' said referd to the old version
I didn't like this; you didn't tie the scene together to make a powerful point; you just stated your point at the end and left it dangling. The main reason I came here was... spelling... because it is my pet peeve. I'm afraid I don't know how to help you except for suggesting a rewrite, but I figure it would behoove of you to know these spellings for next time...
