Young Writers Society

Yesterday I saw you in all your glory:
A frayed yellow towel around your midriff
As you sped after my snarling dog
(He was chasing your kitty, after all). - haha.

And I, calling feebly for my supposed best friend, - freebly?
Praying that your Darling was faster than he,
Stopped in fascinated horror as you,
In your royal saffron,
Swung that lethal broom at my Boy.

And he yelped and stuck his tail between his legs
So you scooped up your spitting Darling
While I groped for a handhold within Boy’s blubber.
And I marveled admiringly at your blatant disregard
For any code of conduct
Or decency;
And your disdainful nose
Turning up prettily
At the mulletman whistling at you
Through his gapped teeth.

A muttered apology was all I could muster
After your brief (but majestic) speech
About ‘keeping that terror on a leash’ -
Because what good would it do to argue that
Boy just plain wouldn’t wear one?

As you turned haughtily to return to your bubble bath,
Down came the yellow towel
And I averted my eyes like any good man,
Risking a glance only when I could be sure
Of your coverage.

And I watched you go,
Stared at the growing red on your graceful neck
Until I realized how like the mulletman I must look –
Leering after you –
Despite my wholesome intentions.

So Boy and I turned too,
Both sending backward glances
At you with your Darling clutched in your arms
The corner of the yellow fluttering with each step.

At home in the kitchen
I dried Boy off with a yellow towel
And thought of you.

I was sort of really distracted when I read this (to be perfectly honest) so I can't really critique it to my fullest. But I could definitely tell that this poem was really, truly great. Why? Because all the time I read this I was like, "Dude, this poem is like freakin' GREAT. Is this person a professional poet?"
HA. Yellow towel.
KEEP WRITING!

Hehh...thank you all's. Yeah, it actually didn't occur to me until you guys pointed it out about the midriff/gender confusion. I was thinking midriff = mid = middle = towl wrapped around entire middle part of body, which to me is the torso. Thanks for pointing it out...I'll change it for any future..ness. Just for the record, the towel-person was a female when I wrote it. Now, I'm not so sure. In any case, the figure I saw wrapped in a towel chasing a dog in the park was definately a woman.

I'm sure you're tired of hearing this, but I LOVE this poem. The whole things. Utterly. Especially the title, which is what drew me to it in the first place. Spectacular! I agree though that the gender ambiguity is a little weird. Maybe you could change the word "midriff". Or not. Its still an awesome poem - I have nothing whatever to critique. Kudos!

A muttered apology was all I could muster
After your brief (but majestic) speech
About ‘keeping that terror on a leash’ -

i love this poem SOOOOO much!!!

the thing that made me read this in the 1st
place wuz the title - it cud just b any subject...

Adventures in Yellow (!)

i just love how u can write bout that sort of
subject & make it sound so intrestin! so far
i havent succeeded in writing anythin like this...

so anyways KEEP IT UP!!!

gender ambiguity... maybe you can take that somewhere, lol.

I got the impression myself that the Yellow Towel Person was male, but that's just me.

I really love this! Very interesting, and it made me laugh out loud!

~Skye Demon

i love this! it's a breath of fresh air, very unique.

I just have one little spot that's bugging me...

A frayed yellow towel around your midriff

At home in the kitchen
I dried Boy off with a yellow towel
And thought of you.

I like it! It caught me off guard...very interesting story! It's not a 'normal' poetry piece (it's not about death or nature or something like that) which is one of the reasons I like it The beginning of the second stanza felt a little bit long to me, but it fit in okay with the poem as a whole. All in all I'm not sure why I like this as much as I do, but the important thing is that I do

For the strangest reason, this poem sounded like something that Cynthia Voigt would have written. Strange, but yet appealing and intriguing. I really did enjoy this after the first stanza, however which seemed to me to be broken up and chopped up in places. Other than that, great work. I actually enjoyed this.