Just keep going. Don't get bogged down. Just keep the words flowing, even if you don't think the story is gelling together.
Don't lose hope!
I sat outside after reading yet again a vampire book. I wish my prayers would be anwsered and I could be a vampire. My life sucks I needed something, to be differnt.I wanted to be a vampire.My little brother walked outside. “You have to come in ,mom said”
hope this is okay so far
Just keep going. Don't get bogged down. Just keep the words flowing, even if you don't think the story is gelling together.
Don't lose hope!
Hey this is good so far, but you have a few grammatical errors.
I think it shoud be I sat outside after reading yet again another vampire book.
I sat outside after reading yet again a vampire book.
My life sucks I needed something, to be differnt.I wanted to be a vampire.My little brother walked outside. “You have to come in ,mom said”
I liked it but it really was far too short of a start. It really needed to be at least a big paragraph or two paragraphs to really catch a readers attention. The title was what really made me want to read the story and that was really good. When you are writing you want an eye popping title like yours. Add more and make others want to read it. I mean that's what a writer wants right? 
I'm sorry dude. I came here as a request on my WRFF. Unfortunately, the rest have covered what there is/ (which is not much) I read the whole thing in like one second. You gotta post more. Peace.
Are you kidding? Will you post only this much? Okay if you want to post this much only but atleast make your write-up a bit more interesting. If you edit thus then i think you will have a great story in your hand.
Hi, PenNPaper here to review!
differnt
vampire.My
You have to come in ,mom said
I liked it but you have to add a lot more than a few sentences...(No offence). I think it has a lot of potential and I can't wait for the next part.
~ Apple
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