z

Young Writers Society


I like pie ^^



User avatar
280 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 794
Reviews: 280
Sun Oct 19, 2008 10:06 am
Nutty says...



Okay guys, I've been here for a while now, and am now an Instructor, so it is time for me to buckle down and help out!

What I will critique:


-Anything from the fiction forums. i.e Sci-fi, Fantasy, Other fiction etc.

-If you want me to critique fanfiction, however, check if I know what it is based on first, or I'll be lost!

-I'm willing to give my opinion on art, but I'm no guru.

What I won't critique:


- Poetry. I don't know enough about how poetry works to be much use, I'm afraid ^^

-Lyrics. Can't write a song to save myself.

-Scripts

Cost:

I expect nothing in return, and I will do my best to be as much use as possible :wink:

First come, first served. I'll post the title of critiqued stories here: (Now hidden, the list was getting long. Click below to check it out)
[spoiler]
-Scavenger 1.1- TL-G Wooster (Oct 30th)
-Scavenger 1.2- TL-G Wooster (Nov 2nd)
-Scavenger 1.3- TL-G Wooster (Nov 2nd)
-Heart's illusion prologue- Maki-Chan (Nov 9th)
***sorry for the delay, have been doing exams***
-Heart's illusion- Maki-Chan (Dec 1st)
-Project Fugato-Reason Invalid (Dec 1st)
-Project Fugato (2)- Reason Invalid (Dec 1st)
-Walking in the dark- LovableLittleSock (Dec 1st)
-Chapter ten, Childhood-wisemann210 (Dec 3rd)
-The Method of Madness-melkor (Dec 3rd)
-Well this shouldn't be! prologue- Lord Anzius (Dec 3rd)
-The mansion chapter 1- Lord Anzius (Dec 4th)
-The mansion chapter 2-Lord Anzius (Dec 6th)
-The ripper prologue-Lord Anzius (Dec 6th)
-Adelade, a prologue- Lost_in_dreamland (Dec 6th)
-Already Won Me- Lilymoore (Dec 8th)
-Dr/Mr Vandergaurd-Kissthewitch (Dec 9th)
-My Dearest Madelyn-anti-pop (Dec 14th)
-Cat steps-Rosey Unicorn (Dec 15th)
-The love Note (heavily edited)- Jamie_rocks (Dec 15th)
-Come back with me-KailiaMarie (Dec 18th)
-Chapter one of my werewolf story- Haruno Sakura (Dec 16th)
-Killer's point of View- LilyJamey (Dec 18th)
-Poison Love-Night Mistress (Dec 18-19th...done over midnight LOL)
-Accidents happen- Kaylyn (Dec 20th)
-Poison Love chapter one-Night Mistress (Dec 21st)
-Well, this shouldn't be chapter one- Lord Anzius (Dec 21st)
-Well, this shouldn't be chapter two- Lord Anzius (Dec 21st)
**sorry. Camping and holiday stuff. ><; ***
-Mansion, chapter three- Lord Anzius (21st January)
-Mansion, chapter four- Lord Anzius (21st Jan)
-Bloodlust- Lucyy (21st Jan)
-Tomorrow Does Not Exist, Part one - JosephDean (23rd Jan)
-Tomorrow Does Not Exist, Part two - JosephDean (23rd Jan)
-Tomorrow Does Not Exist, Part three- JosephDean (25-26th Jan)
-Tomorrow Does Not Exist, Part Four- JosephDean (26th Jan)
-Night Visitor- Pippiedooda (26th Jan)
-Christmas Magic-Rosey Unicorn (27th Jan)
-Unzipped I- Hannah (27th Jan)
-Unzipped II-Hannah (27th Jan)
-Unzipped III-Hannah (28th Jan)
-Trapped- asxz (29th Jan)
-Split personalities (30 Jan)
-Split personalities part 2 (feb 1)
-Split personalities part 3 (feb 2)
-Prince of Janovia chapter one part 1 (feb 4)
-Prince of Janovia chapter one part 2 -BeckiW(feb 5)
-Gaea 1-8- Excalibur (21-23 Feb)
-Shepard's Lamb-Maki-Chan (25 Feb)
-The Fairies Gift- Rosey Unicorn (25 Feb)
-For the Girls chapter two- Moriah Leila (25 Feb)
-You kept me alive- My Sunshine (1st March)
[/spoiler]
So you know where your story is in the line.

So, any requests?
Last edited by Nutty on Sun Mar 01, 2009 11:16 am, edited 44 times in total.
It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.





User avatar
1176 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 1979
Reviews: 1176
Tue Oct 28, 2008 11:32 pm
Twit says...



topic36822.html

topic37326.html

topic37980.html

They're 1, 2 and 3, btw, thankyou please. :D
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this."


#TNT





User avatar
287 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1650
Reviews: 287
Sat Nov 08, 2008 7:33 pm
Maki-Chan says...



prologue and chapter 1 need reviews ^_^


topic35779.html - prologue

topic35820.html -chapter 1
check out my deviantart account ^_^
http://maki121.deviantart.com/





User avatar
26 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 890
Reviews: 26
Sat Nov 08, 2008 9:31 pm
Reason Invalid says...



post412171.html

topic38364.html

Both of them aren't necessarily posted by chapters, but oh well... :P Thanks in advance.
It is only when dissonance plays one will find pleasure in consonance.
topic34094.html <-- Free Reviews





User avatar
189 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 1040
Reviews: 189
Sat Nov 08, 2008 9:36 pm
Jon says...



www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic38422.html

(Chapter Eight of Eight)
Fantasy
you're welcome to read the first seven too, but no review on those, just eight thanks!


thankyou


---Jon---
:D
Gay Writing/Support Group. Gay or not, spread the word!

Support GLBT people -- God does.

Got YWS?





User avatar
183 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 2168
Reviews: 183
Mon Nov 10, 2008 8:52 pm
LoveableLittleSock says...



Hey. Could you please review this for me? It'd be greatly appreciated. Just remember to read the link first, okay? =]

topic38505.html

Thanks a bunch!
Got YWS?





User avatar
17 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 890
Reviews: 17
Wed Nov 12, 2008 1:30 pm
melkor says...



Shhesh.
You people suck at asking for reviews.

You either have to make them feel appreciatted, or simply scare the pants off them.


Observe:


Hey nutty..

I know you're oh so busy being lord fantastitcal and you deserve a medal for your face's perfection which you have yet to get, but would it be possible to have a little review from you?

Oh and if you don't, I'll rip your eyes out, feed them to a parrot, and then crush you with a big yellow crane.


Thanks in advance.:D

Name: The Method of madness
Genre: Action/adventure
Summary: I guess it's sort of a psychological study of what is debatably a mad person.
Word Count: lots? Less than four thousand at any rate...
Link: topic38538.html

"He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. "
"It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes."
~Douglas Adams





User avatar
123 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 82
Reviews: 123
Sat Nov 29, 2008 3:14 pm
Lord Anzius says...



Please review these:

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic36987.html This shouldn't be prologue

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic34323.html The mansion chapter 1

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic35415.html The mansion chapter 2

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic34985.html The ripper prologue
To copy reality is good... But to create reality is much, much better.
-Giuseppe Verdi-





User avatar
273 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 273
Sun Nov 30, 2008 1:30 pm
Lost_in_dreamland says...



topic39240.html
Hahah I've got a huge lack of reviews, Sarah reviewed it and her's is amazing but I need more :lol:
Thanks so much (you don't have to review if you don't want to :lol:)
Kirsten x
for what are we without words and stories?





User avatar
675 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 28467
Reviews: 675
Thu Dec 04, 2008 2:56 am
lilymoore says...



Ha, well, sense you offered you can review my little short romance piece. Thanks.

post459618.html#459618
Never forget who you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.





User avatar
280 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 794
Reviews: 280
Mon Dec 08, 2008 8:08 pm
Nutty says...



Finally, I have that lot finished. ><; Sorry to those who had delayed reviews, I had things pop up.
Anyway, anyone else have any requests?
It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.





User avatar
312 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 6403
Reviews: 312
Tue Dec 09, 2008 2:50 am
Mars says...



topic39909.html

It's the first part, I haven't posted the rest yet, but it's kind of introductory, so I just really need help on descriptions, wording, etc. Thanks a lot!
'life tastes sweeter when it's wrapped in poetry'
-the wombats


critiques // nano





User avatar
143 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 1781
Reviews: 143
Sat Dec 13, 2008 5:35 am
anti-pop says...



Pleased to meet you, Nutty :)
I'm anti-pop

Here's something I'm going to submit in a contest and I want to make sure it's as good as it can get!
topic40024.html
It's a romance and kinda sad. Just a heads-up. :D

Thanks a bunch!


*anti-pop
...Bitter cold, it grows
changing holds
cynicism the new norm...

-Libretto





User avatar
280 Reviews

Supporter


Gender: Female
Points: 794
Reviews: 280
Sun Dec 14, 2008 11:28 pm
Nutty says...



Okay, those two are done and dusted. Any more?
It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.





User avatar
1272 Reviews



Gender: Other
Points: 89625
Reviews: 1272
Mon Dec 15, 2008 12:08 am
Rosendorn says...



topic40125.html

I'm trying to get a better view of what I need to work on in my writing style by getting a few more critiques on this piece. Point out any places I need to spend more time on an idea, slow down in my change in topic or generally loose the reader. And anything you like. Let's not leave that out.

Please and thank you!
A writer is a world trapped in a person— Victor Hugo

Ink is blood. Paper is bandages. The wounded press books to their heart to know they're not alone.








The true adventurer goes forth aimless and uncalculating to meet and greet unknown fate.
— O. Henry (William Sydney Porter)