Sing/rap this and send it to me I’ll produce it and send it back
Sunny days
chasin' the clouds away-
grab your backpack, let's go
i
n
t
o
the
unknown
say it three times in a row
and you won't believe
how
f
a
r
i'll g
o
if i knew then what
i know now
life is short,
and-
he lives on Sesame Street, dumbass
NOOOOO,
i'm not afraid of snakes,
and in t h e bad times
i fear myself,
paciencia y fe,
little one,
'cause i've got friends on the
other side.
First off I wanna say... Hey how are you?
Second I want to say I like the idea of your poem. I was confused but I think that was the poem and I also feel like it was the point of it. Like random thoughts in a persons head during the day.
I must admit it took a few times to read to get it and I must also admit that I don't.
I do want to read King of the Ocean though so... Yeah...
Keep writing
Y E S S S S S! You did such a great job with this C:
but I have to know...
...do you speak Spanish?
Hey! Plume here, with a review!!
I really love the concept of this poem! It's so clever, combining several quotes from various things. You're managed to pull it off, and it's surprisingly cohesive for something of this nature. It's a bit like a Franken-poem.
One thing I really loved was the way it played out in my head. I don't know if this is what you intended, but to me, it sounded like a sort of channel-switching chaotic— thing. Like as I progressed, the tune would change, and it had this jarring-yet-really-cool effect. So even if it wasn't intended, nice job, because that was pretty cool to me.
Also, just gonna throw this out there: I really love all the musical references in this. Especially Beetlejuice and In The Heights
I guess one thing I was confused about was whether this poem was supposed to have a storyline or not. I couldn't really pick up on one. To me, it just sounds like my brain when it can't figure out what song it wants to have stuck in my head. I think that having a storyline would be a really cool step up for this type of poem, and it would make the cohesiveness even more impressive.
Overall: lovely job!! I thought this was a great and funny poem, and I really love the concept of combining lines to make something entirely new yet just as exciting and fun.
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