Wow. The title is so interesting and original, as is the rest of the story. One specific part had me doubled over laughing."Maids! Stop doing TikTok dances!" It was so relatable to my school hallways. I hope to read part 2 soon!

Anyways, thanks for the story!!

PS thanks for commenting on my first book!

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

First Impression: A pretty solid place to start I think. It captures quite the vibe here for this place. I think it manages to be pretty interesting here and get our attention. This boss man also gets a pretty good bit of personality here and I think they are a pretty interesting character so far.

Anyway let's get right to it,

The big boss was staring at the board with a strange expression on his face. The board held several lines and numbers. Nobody would really understand it but him.

"hm," he said quietly, his gaze drifting over the newfangled software. "The statistics are low... we need a new spy!" He took a deep breath and walked over to the coffee machine in the corner, where a young woman with dark brown hair was making his latte.

"You! Maid! Whatever your name is! Get me my coffee!"

"Yes, sir, boss, man!" said the girl.

"It's the Big Boss. I expect you'll remember that in the future." He then walked over to his desk and sat in the comfortable seat, preparing his papers.

"Assistant! Get me my coffee!" A mysterious person with a hidden face stepped out of the shadows. Nobody knew who that person was, but that was probably for the best. After all, spying is a dangerous business.

The person nodded, and grabbed his cup from the sink where the maid left it. The person dropped it quietly on his desk.

"Thank you." he said. "I need... May Bellwether and John Saturf."

The person nodded, and walked down the hallway, hearing voices from the offices close by.

"New spies?"

"How are you today?"

"You have to watch this video."

"Can you print this out for me? It's a sheet on different types of poisons."

Finally, the person got to the end of the hallway, to the brightest lit room. A girl was sitting there.

"You're May Bellwether, I presume," They said with a voice void of emotion.

"Yeah." she said, staring up from the computer she was looking at.

"The Big Boss wants to see you."

"The Big Boss?"

"Follow me."

The two of them walked back to the office, where it was dimly lit. The big boss was sitting at their desk quietly.

"This is May," said the person.

"And John-"

"Out sick today,"

"Yes," the person, and slid over a paper.

"Sign here, here, and here." said the Big Boss. He pointed to some open slots, written with things like:

in case of any loss, the corporation will not be responsible for paying and medical bills. May honestly didn't know what to think, but- this is what you've been waiting for! she reminded herself. May took the pen one of the maids held out for her, and signed her name in the designated areas.

The bog boss's office was quiet, until loud music filled the room.

"Maid! Answer my phone!" A maid picked up an old flip-phone and asked wryly, "Who's Wifey?"

" We don't talk about that," said the Big Boss, and answered the phone.

"It's time for you to go home!" The big boss's wife yelled, and the Big Boss automatically turned off speaker phone.

"No, no! I'm at work!... I know your meatloaf is delicious, but that's not the case right now!... Since when do you care?" Then the boss slammed the phone closed and said, "I am going home."

He packed up his things, then walked out of the office, and slammed the door behind him, while all the servants started dancing.

"No more boss! NO more boss!" They cried in happiness.

creak... Suddenly the door opened again and May walked in.

"Uh... What just happened?" She asked.

Hi,
I'm thrilled to leave you an review and some suggestions.
I hope they help!

firstly, I think this story can benefit more from character development, especially May and the Big Boss. Adding more depth and complexity to their personalities can make the story more engaging and relatable.

secondly, instead of telling the readers that Big Boss is the only one who understands the board with statistics. Try showing how he uses his expertise to interpret the data.

third; Make a conflict or goal for the characters to work towards.
- For example, May could have a specific mission or objective that she needs to accomplish as a spy, which would create tension and keep the story moving forward.

fourth; The story can benefit from more description of the setting and the characters.
- For example, adding details about the office decor or the appearance of the characters can make the story more immersive and engaging.

Some titles you could use:
- The Big Boss and the new Spy
- (humor) > The Dark Side of the Coffee Machine
- May's first day as a spy
- The unpredictable Boss
- The boss needs spies

Overall: I really liked the story. I loved the fact that the boss was such a tyran and it looked like no one could really come between him and his coffee. 🤣 But in the end it was his wife that made that roaring tiger became a nice kitten. I love your dialogues!

I didn't mean to be rude or offend you in any way possible, i'm just leaving a review.

- Rinisha

As I began to read this piece, I couldn't help but notice a striking similarity to the training academy depicted in the movie "Kingsmen." The disciplined and rigorous nature of the training described in the piece brought to mind the intense and grueling training that the protagonists of the movie underwent.

However, the mood quickly shifted when the author brought up the topic of TikTok dances. This unexpected and somewhat incongruous mention caught me off guard and elicited an unexpected burst of laughter, almost causing me to do a spit take.

then there was the line that encapsulated the whole piece - "when the boss is away, kids will play." It left me with a sense of curiosity and anticipation, wondering who these "kids" were and what sort of mischievous activities they might be engaging in. I can't wait to see how the story unfolds and find out who they are spying on.

nothing to see here

Hi Fox! This is Zenith with a short review.
Firstly, I have a question. What does the words in big black bold symbolize? Is Jeden the name of one of the characters ... say Big Boss? Is he Polish? If he is Polish then maybe you should try to add some cultural symbolism to the story and go the "show not tell" approach. I am merely speculating and it probably means something else.
Now coming to the story. I think it's a fun and intriguing short story that really captivates the reader as to what's ahead. With that being said, I still feel that it has room for improvement.

Nobody would really understand it-except him.
This statement and the hyphen here feels out of place and instead you can write 'Nobody would really understand it but him.' This has a much better flow.

I can see some punctuation errors especially around dialogues which I am sure you can fix on a second read.

I like how the maid is not sure how to address the boss (sir, boss, man!) which says that she hasn't been working there for long. This manages to add a humorous touch to the story and also simultaneously convey that the boss is to be feared.

"Helper person! Get me my coffee!"
Instead of Helper person, you can try out some synonyms like assistant or something to keep the commanding vibe in the dialogue.

The person nodded, and grabbed his cup from the sink where the maid left it.The person dropped it on his desk.
Relace maid left it with maid had left it and replace dropped with placed it quietly on his desk.

"Thank you." he said. "I need... May Bellwether and John Saturf."
The Thank you here makes him a nice guy so if you are not aiming for his character to be that way, consider removing that.

I like how we get to see a better glimpse into this organization and its working through the voices overheard on the way. You might want to add more substance into that.

They said, their voice void of emotion.
They said in a voice void of emotion.

"Yeah." she said, staring up from the computer she was looking at.
"Yeah." she said, looking up from the computer screen she was staring at.

The big boss was sitting at their desk quietly.
Previously you used he/him pronouns for big boss so try to be consistent in that.

"Yes," the person, and slid over a paper.
"Yes," The person answered and slid over a paper. Also try to use many different verbs and not just 'said'. That keeps things interesting

He pointed to some open slots, written with things like:
He pointed to some open slots. A statement caught her attention:

but she reminded herself- <i>this is what you have been waiting for...!<i>Try to put the inner thoughts in italics for a smoother flow.

On the way out, she heard the boss say:"Maids! Stop doing TikTok dances!"
On the way out, she heard the boss shout, "Maids! Stop doing TikTok dances!"
So the above line feels really bizarre for me and I do realize that it's put here for humor purposes. Firstly, it was mentioned that there was one maid and now multiple maids are referenced which doesn't match up. Also, if the boss man is so intimidating then how come the maids are making tiktok infront of him. I would like you to reconsider this.

" We don't talk about that," said the Big Boss, and answered the phone.
" We don't talk about that," The Big Boss snatched away the phone.

"It's time for you to go home!" The big boss's wife yelled, and the Big Boss automatically turned off speaker phone.
"It's time for you to come home!" His wife's threatening voice filled the room, and he fumbled to turn off the speaker quickly.

Then the boss cut off his call and announced irritably, "I am going home."

He packed up his things, then walked out of the office, and slammed the door behind him, while all the servants started dancing.
He packed up his things, then walked out of the office. As he slammed the door shut behind him, all the workers started dancing.

"Uh... What just happened?" She wondered in confusion.

So your writing needs some improvement and so does your grammar and punctuation. But regardless, I think your creativity and ability to infuse humor into your story makes up for it. Please don't mind all the corrections. They are merely to help you out and not from a place of judgment. Either way, Happy Writing!