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The Mirror

by TheScribe



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13 Reviews


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Reviews: 13

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Thu Apr 15, 2021 12:35 am
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Ilium417 wrote a review...



Hiii! Ilium here for a review!
I liked the idea of your poem. Mirrors are really poetic and it's cool to see how people use them in different ways. I liked the topic of your poem, especially because I can think of people at my school that many people see in different ways (we're a smaller school than others).
Structure-wise, I think it's good. I like the mirror in your background- it really works! (I know it would be REALLY complicated, but it would be cool it was an actual mirror but blurred and it reflected the words on the other side, just enough so its not disorienting or difficult to read.)
The last few lines could use a re-word: "letting that purpose see what others see". I don't think that purpose is the right word. Rewording it to talk about the person or the views and not the purpose would be better.
But overall this is a great poem! Good job with this one. Keep writing! :D
Peace and Tacos be with you!




TheScribe says...


Thanks for the review! <33



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155 Reviews


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Wed Apr 14, 2021 4:30 am
ForeverYoung299 says...



Huh! How is that! You literally wrote my idea!! 🙄




TheScribe says...


Did I? XD





Seriously u did!!



Ilium417 says...


I think we should write mirror poems now XD Mirrors are exceptionally poetic after all.
You know what, I'ma do it. I'll tag you ;)



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Wed Apr 14, 2021 4:14 am
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NivedaJames22 wrote a review...



Hey!

First of all, lemme just say I really like the idea of this poem! Different people perceive you in different ways. You can be a dependable friend and a hated adversary. It all depends on the viewpoint. You have portrayed this point very well.

I also like the font. It looks nice and is also legible. The picture also suits the poem.

I think that maybe in this line, you should use "who" instead of "that":
And firm (that) can't be broken

Also, I think there's an error in this line. I'm not sure what you meant by purpose here:
Letting that purpose see what

Other than that, it was a lovely poem. Can't wait to read more of your work.

Keep writing.




TheScribe says...


Thanks for the review!! <3



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Wed Apr 14, 2021 4:06 am
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niteowl wrote a review...



Hi there, TheScribe! Niteowl here to leave a quick review.

Haha, the first poem I wrote for fun and eventually posted here was about mirrors, a rather subpar attempt at self reflection. So it's a fun theme to write about. Personally, I'm not sure about the font. It's a bit hard to read, but maybe I just need new glasses. :P

Overall, I like the ideas here, that there can be such contrast in what people see depending on whether they feel strong and firm or broken, as well as the idea that others can see things about ourselves that we normally don't.

That said, I feel like it could be fleshed out a little more. I'd be curious to know the people looking in the mirror a bit more--what is the strong person seeing that reinforces their confidence? What does the broken person see that makes them feel that way? It would be interesting to set the scene a bit--are they getting ready for the day in their bathroom mirror, or did they catch sight of their own reflection going out and about somewhere? Bringing in more details can really make your poem stand out.

The next thing I noticed was the repetition of "things" and "purpose". I had an English teacher who said if we ever used the word "things" in an essay, she'd cross it out and write "bananas". Granted, a poem isn't an essay, but the idea still stands. "Things" is a pretty weak word, and while sometimes you really can't find a better substitute, many times you can. Here, I might leave the "so many things" part and replace the first "thing" with "one object", though there might be a better word choice for either one of them I can't think of at the moment.

As for "purpose", I think that's an easier fix. The first "purpose" is fine, but the second part is a little clunky. I might change it to something like "That's the purpose of a mirror, showing you what others see...".

Overall, this was a good thought-provoking poem. Keep writing! :D




TheScribe says...


Thanks for the review!! <3



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Tue Apr 13, 2021 10:24 pm
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MellyBourne wrote a review...



I really liked this poem. It didn't blow me away with the language or emotion, but you gave me a new perspective at something as simple, as looking into a mirror. Gotta admit I am a bit confused by the way you divide some of the sentences, sometimes just cutting them in half to start a new verse, but that's just a nitpick really. The whole thing is great.




TheScribe says...


Thanks for the review!




All truly wise thoughts have been thought already thousands of times; but to make them truly ours, we must think them over again honestly, till they take root in our personal experience.
— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe