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Young Writers Society



The Voyage of the Mayflower

by SpunkyMonkey


Desire was walking around the Mayflower, observing the mast, stern, and starboard. She was very proud that she knew the names of these things. As she aimlessly walked along, she bumped into someone. She scurried up to her feet and stole a look at whom she had collided with. It was a girl in a plain blue dress about her age sitting on the ground, with her coif laying limp on the floor next to her.

“Sorry,” Desire whispered.

Elisabeth hurriedly stood and, at lightning speed, retied her coif atop her head.

“Its alright,” Elisabeth said sheepishly. “Besides, I should be the one to apologize. I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“Neither was I,” admitted Desire. “Were you on the Speedwell? I don’t think I’ve seen you before.”

“Yes, I was,” replied Elisabeth. “I was terror-stricken after it leaked the first time. Once it headed out again, I couldn’t concentrate on anything, because I was so panicky.”

“Well I better get going because Mr. Carver is looking for me,” remarked Desire. 

“Okay, but tell me your name before you go. My name is Elisabeth Tilley.”

“My name is Desire Minter.”

“I’ll see you later Desire!” Elizabeth said with enthusiasm. “Goodbye!”

“Till we meet again!” laughed Desire.

After about two weeks of sailing Desire became seasick, and she wouldn’t leave from behind her sheet, which separated her sleeping space from the travelers adjacent to her.

“Elizabeth,” her Mother began, “Why don’t you walk around the ship. You need fresh air. And afterwards you may visit Desire.”

“Thank you Mother!” Elizabeth exclaimed.

Elizabeth escaped the stuffy room as quickly as her petticoats would allow. She climbed up the stairs and roamed around the deck of the ship slowly, taking in all the details. The saltiness on her tongue, the wind on her cheeks and the orders from the Master. The thrill of swaying back and forth in time with the waves. She loved the sea. After about fifteen minutes Elizabeth started back down into the belly of the ship to search for Desire. Once she found Desire, Elizabeth was certain her friend needed some care.

“Oh Elizabeth, you need to help me!” mumbled Desire.

“Did your Mother bring any herbs of some sort,” Elizabeth asked kindly.

“I don’t have any parents. They’re both dead. Mr. Carver, my guardian, is bringing me,” was the blunt answer.

Elizabeth silently breathed a prayer for her friend, and returned to her Mother for some herbs, which she hoped would assist Desire’s recovery. To cheer up her patient Elizabeth asked, “Didn’t Mr. Carver have enough sense about him to pack soap? He didn’t even bring a pot!”

“I told him he should have brought some type of pot or even a frying pan but he was convinced all he needed was a gridiron,” Desire said.

“My Mother is the opposite. In fact, she brought every single article of clothing we own and made my Father bring his armor.”

At that, the duo began laughing. Elizabeth looked relieved. She secretly harbored the thought her friend didn’t have the strength to recover because she had been pale and thin for as long as Elizabeth had known her.

Several days later the waves became choppy. Master Christopher Jones warned the seasick passengers to stay under the deck since a storm was under way. Unfortunately, it was during this time Mrs. Hopkins went into labor. All the mothers of the Mayflower acted as midwives for her. Mrs. Tilley took her daughter aside and ordered Elizabeth to tell her father to ask the sailors for water. Elizabeth hurried away, looking rather white and squeamish from the cries of pain, and her look attracted the attention of John Howland.

“Whatever is the matter?” he asked kindly.

“I’m fetching Father to ask him to retrieve water from-”

“Never mind,” Mr. Howland interrupted, “I’ll fetch it for you. Wait here.”

For, being a cocky young man he considered not the peril. Elizabeth obediently waited for him but once he was absent for several minutes, she rushed to Desire. Once Desire understood the situation she flew up the stairs. Elizabeth rebuked herself for her cowardice and darted after her friend.

“Why are you up here?” a surly sailor yelled,

“Mr. Howland is missing,” Desire replied.

The sailor hollered at his fellow seaman to check if Mr. Howland fell overboard as he pulled the girls back down the stairs. As they were taken below, they caught a glimpse of Mr. Howland being pulled up from the side of the Mayflower. Mr. Howland was successfully found and rescued, thanks to Elizabeth and Desire.

On November 9th, early in the morning, sailors chanted out the beloved words,

“Land ho!”

Desire rushed up to the top deck and saw in amazement the contrast of the luscious green trees against the pale morning sky.

“Mr. Carver, when do you think the Mayflower will be brought into the harbor?” Desire asked.

“I don’t believe we will land in Cape Cod for a couple of hours.”

Desire waited patiently, watching the landscape, until the ship landed. She pulled Elizabeth out of her hammock and onto the deck.

“We made it!!” They exclaimed simultaneously.

“Not quite,” remarked Mr. Carver “We’ve missed our destination, the Hudson River, by a couple hundred miles.”

“You don’t mean we have farther to travel, do you?” Desire questioned.

“Yes I do.”

At first the officers skillfully navigated the waters. But supplies began to dwindle, the ship fought headwinds, and they were in unknown seas. As a result the Master ordered the ship to be turned around. A few weeks was spent at Cape Cod, where the Mayflower compact was composed and signed. After the excitement and joy of the signing, they sailed from Cape Cod, and harbored in Plymouth.

Once the duo finally found each other on solid ground, they grasped each other and mixed tears. All the suffering, storms, and seasickness was worth it. A bright and prosperous future was ahead. And they were ready for it.


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Points: 41
Reviews: 1

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Tue Sep 08, 2020 8:54 pm
LOLACONER says...



Hmm..I enjoy reading the story,it's interesting and has a plot of sea voyage line,i have never been out for a sea cruise,though some part of the story was confusing especially this line: “Well I better get going because Mr. Carver is looking for me,” remarked Desire. “Okay, but tell me your name before you go. My name is Elisabeth Tilley.”

it gives me the impression of bearing different names by one person(that's Desire),i got to understand that line when i continued the story.Though i enjoyed the story,what the story is trying to tell is real and touching.
It's an adventure for someone to experience,Keep it up!




User avatar


Points: 41
Reviews: 1

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Tue Sep 08, 2020 8:53 pm
LOLACONER wrote a review...



Hmm..I enjoy reading the story,it's interesting and has a plot of sea voyage line,i have never been out for a sea cruise,though some part of the story was confusing especially this line: “Well I better get going because Mr. Carver is looking for me,” remarked Desire. “Okay, but tell me your name before you go. My name is Elisabeth Tilley.”

it gives me the impression of bearing different names by one person(that's Desire),i got to understand that line when i continued the story.Though i enjoyed the story,what the story is trying to tell is real and touching.
It's an adventure for someone to experience,Keep it up!



Random avatar
SpunkyMonkey says...


Thanks for the review lolaconer!



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11 Reviews


Points: 452
Reviews: 11

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Thu Sep 03, 2020 7:13 pm
JunePearl wrote a review...



Hi Spacekitty!

I enjoyed reading the story, and as you already know, I love happy endings. I consider it to be very impressive that you managed to make an interesting historical fiction short story. I also really liked the part about John Howland partially because it reminded me of a paper I wrote a years ago, and because I think it was a creative reason for him to leave the boat.

There was one part that kind of confused me.

“Well I better get going because Mr. Carver is looking for me,” remarked Desire. “Okay, but tell me your name before you go. My name is Elisabeth Tilley.”

I had to reread it a few times to realize that It was first Desire who was speaking, and the Elizabeth. I think you probably should have put what Desire said on a different line because it looked like it was the same person speaking.

Welp, that's all for me. And nice DAR paper, I can tell why you're so good. Keep up the great work!

-TeyaKnife



Random avatar
SpunkyMonkey says...


Thanks TeyaKnife! I fixed the issue by making that a separate paragraph



JunePearl says...


I see. And you should be proud if that's worst thing I could find


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SpunkyMonkey says...


:)



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58 Reviews


Points: 1962
Reviews: 58

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Thu Sep 03, 2020 6:41 pm
Lezuli wrote a review...



Hello, there! I shall be reviewing this for you today!
Allow me to star out by saying that this was a very nice story. The girls encountered obstacles, battled sickness and pain, and emerged victorious through it all. I like the ending as well.
As for my suggestions- there are very few.

She scurried up to her feet and stole a look at whom she had collided with.

In the previous sentence, you never mentioned that Desire fell over, so this sentence confused me a bit. Maybe add that she fell over when she ran into Elisabeth.
“Elizabeth,” her Mother began, “Why don’t you walk around the ship. You need fresh air. And afterwards you may visit Desire.”

Two things here. #1 : This quotation came right out of the blue. I figured that you would swap perspectives, but this was really sudden and it took me a few times to read it to figure out that we weren't seeing things from Destiny's point of view anymore. And #2 : You missed a question mark after 'ship'.
And that's all I have for you! I hope this helps you.



Random avatar
SpunkyMonkey says...


for your first critique, I implied she fell over because it says she bumped into someone. and for the second, I should have caught that, but as I said in the description, I made this last year for a contest, so I won't change that. But thank you, I'm glad you liked it



Lezuli says...


Ah, I see. That makes sense! Thanks for clearing it up!


Random avatar
SpunkyMonkey says...


Of course! ;)




Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
— Thomas Edison