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Blood Sisters - Chapter Six (Alice)

by Rosewood


A dull pulsing in my head grows more painfully ever second, and it is ultimately the cause of my waking. I pause, letting my eyelids flutter at the light. It's too bright and uneven - I can't open my eyes any wider than a squint. Instead of pushing them too far, I attempt to flex my fingers. One hand complies stiffly but the other remains strangely numb. A horror seeps into me at the idea. Why isn't my hand working? And my shooting hand at that! I desperately want to get a good look at the cause of the problem, but my eyes continue to resist.

I force my stiff hand to rub my head in the spot causing me most trouble. My fingers probe the wound and hesitate. There's a deep gash, and blood is seeping out at a constant rate. My skull feels intact, but the pulsing increases at the touch of my fingers. I doubt I fractured it, but again, there's the cut to account for.

I push my stable hand back and force myself into a sitting position. A scream is stifled through gritted teeth - I'm aware it's my own. The blurriness persists but less so. Shapes can be made out like the pool of my own blood clotting in the sand.

Another gasp of air is pushed out of me when my memory jumps back into my head. My body, severely injured is through my own fault. I jumped and I payed the price. At least I'm not dead. Rory might be though.

In all honesty, I never predicted nor considered how my brother would react if I missed the ledge. He could've slaughtered her quickly to grieve in piece. He could've taken her to be tortured. For all I know, he could've left her alone to starve in peace. But I do know that she's doomed - all thanks to me.

The rims of my eyes sting and I blink away tears. Crying has never done me any good and I doubt it ever will. My brain remedies the situation with a less than pleasant idea, but I embrace it whole-heartedly. I grit my teeth and bend my protesting neck to face my left arm. 

It's pale, as light as milk. Any sort of color has been leeched out - the blood gone as if it were never there. Then, I begin to see the form. It's badly mangled. Twisted out of shape. Useless.

I've never broken a bone, at least none of which were mine, but I know what I have to do. I lay my forearm flat on the shore and close my eyes. At the count of three, I stand up and place my feet near it. Then I jump, placing my feet carefully.

CRACK

I can't contain my shriek this time, and I hardly pay attention to it rebounding off the stone walls. Maybe Harold will hear me and come to rescue me. I'll strangle him if he does. Minutes pass by but no sound of footsteps can be heard - only the waves lapping against the shore.

Fine, I think to myself. Holding my limp arm as straight as I can, I push myself to my wobbly feet, fighting gravity to stay upright. The ground sways and my vision blurs, but I swallow a few breaths of air. There's a stick nearby, too short to use as a walking stick, but it'll serve nicely to hold my arm straight. I carefully tug off my jacket and wrap it around the stick and my arm and tie the sleeves together. It isn't much, and I'll have to get something better later, but at least I can keep the bone in a straighter position. Curious, I try gently closing my fingers and succeed in making them twitch. Good. That means the nerves haven't been severed.

I squint upward. The sun in the sky is three-quarters downward and, considering it was morning before I jumped, I assume the night will come in the next few hours. It'll be better if I start making my way up the hill - to escape whatever the night brings and to start my murderous hunt for Harold.


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10 Reviews


Points: 1137
Reviews: 10

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Tue Dec 15, 2020 3:37 am
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Calandra wrote a review...



Greetings. I hate to jump into something right in the middle of it, but I'll free you from the Green Room.

"I can't open my eyes any wider than a squint." If you want your writing to be a bit sharper, may I suggest using something like "more expansive" or really anything that isn't as used as the word "wider" is. I don't mean go crazy with words that are twenty letters long, but something a little less common is great.

For clarity's sake, "I carefully tug off my jacket and wrap it around the stick and my arm and tie the sleeves together" might be able to turn into something along the lines of "I carefully tug off my jacket, wrapped it around the stick and my arm, and tied the sleeves together" or anything else that is clearer to read through.

This was quite short. It didn't feel like a whole chapter in ways. It felt like more of a random scene than anything else. Not that short chapters are a bad thing, it's just about seven hundred words can be considered tiny.

I found this engaging, and I will come back for the next chapter.

Cal




Rosewood says...


Thanks for your helpful feedback! As for its length, I intended that. In the previous chapters, Alice fell off a cliff - presumed to be dead. This was just to check in on her and show you she's still fighting. I know you didn't know that but I just wanted to clear that up!



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Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:40 pm
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NastyMajesty wrote a review...



HELOOO ROOOOOSE! I'll be popping in here for a quick review, hope you're having great day/night wherever you're at! Alright, let's jump right in.

Grows

there was really only one thing I noticed and that's this sentence right here:

There's a stick nearby, too short to use as a walking stick, but it'll serve nicely to hold my straight.
I think you meant "hold my arm straight" right here ;)
MOVING ON :D

GLOWSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

EEEEEEEEEEE YAY ALICE IS ALIVE WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. OMG I CRINGED SO HARD THE DESCRIPTION YOU USED FOR HER INJURIES OMG I THOUGHT HER ARM FELL OFF COMPLETELY FOR A SECOND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BUT IT WAS AMAZING I LOVED IT EEEEE! :D :D :D :D CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTERRRR KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK AND KEEP WRITINGGGGGGG
<3
~YOUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD MAJESTY OF NASTINESS~

Spoiler! :
CAPS LOCK IS MY FRIEND




Rosewood says...


Oh my gosh, thanks!! You're so sweet and I'm going to fix that mistake ASAP.




Wild animals are just as confused as people are now.
— Jack Hanna