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E - Everyone

Only if...

by Rose


Only if you believe

then you can receive

whatever your heart desires

a dream come true or a walk through fire

Only if you understand

that if you just look around

you can see the beauty of the world

it's so much more than what you've learned

Only if you remember

that not only in December

family from far away get the opportunity to be together

https://rosewriting12.blogspot.com/2023/02/only-if...


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59 Reviews

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Fri Aug 04, 2023 7:49 pm
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TheCornDogEnthusiast says...



Hello!
This is a short and sweet poem that I would call good motivation for people who do not see the good in life. That only if they look around, they'll see what they are missing out on. The beauty of the world can go easily unrecognized simply because a person isn't trying.
Other things can go unrecognized as well. In the third stanza, it says that December isn't the only month to get together with family. This is probably referencing families coming together for the holidays, and then not seeing each other for months on end. I can relate to this, my mom's side of the family lives in Texas, which is about a 12 hour drive from where I live, so it's hard to see them often.
Overall, this is a pretty poem that would motivate those who aren't seeing the beauty of the world.




TheCornDogEnthusiast says...


forgot i already reviewed this...



Rose says...


Hey there!
Reviews and feedback are always welcome. Thank you for taking your time again to share some kind words. I'm glad you liked my work.



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Fri Aug 04, 2023 4:58 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...



Beautiful. :) Love is everywhere and anywhere, no matter what. There are golden specks of kindness that lingers in the air, stays in the night, travels through light. Love is the thing that never dies, that will always fly. It’s sweet and endearing, forevermore in the entirety of the world.

I enjoyed reading this little poem. I hope that you will have a wonderful and amazing day and night. Goodbye for right now.




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Fri May 12, 2023 7:13 pm
WinnyWriter wrote a review...



Hey, there! Just a quick review. I found this poem fairly easy to read, so great job with that. While longer ones can be great as well, short and simple ones like this are less taxing on the brain. One thing I did notice, however, that I personally found slightly bothersome is how the first two stanzas have four lines while the last stanza has only three. It seems to deviate from the sense of consistency that was going on.

I don't know whether you were intending for rhyme or not. The rhyme and rhythm were pretty good in the first stanza, though, regardless of whether or not it was intended. I did find that it sort of seemed to fall apart in the second stanza, though. If there is a rhyme going on, it is barely detectable. I saw something of a rhyme reappear in the third stanza, so that's what makes me think you may have intended it. I would just suggest that you keep writing to practice and polish your skills with rhythm and rhyme.

Overall, the message I got from this poem is that a person can find so much more to appreciate if he/she simply stops to notice, observe, and be grateful. The sentiment of that is significant. And while your idea is cohesive throughout the piece, the structure of it could use a bit of work.

Well, that's all for now. I hope you are having a great day, and keep up the good work writing!




Rose says...


Thanks for the feedback!



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Fri May 12, 2023 4:26 pm
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AkuRashomon wrote a review...



Hey @Rose! Nice name by the way<33 This is loveissourgrapes and I am here to give your inspiring poem a short review or comment. Anyways, let's go straight to the point. The introduction was nice and, the whole poem, in general, just hits you with a powerful message no matter how short it is. It encourages people in this site to believe, and it tells us that the world is so much than we know. The last stanza hits different with the mentioned of the family. it tells us the importance of family and how wholesome they can be when all members are together.

Overall, this is a good one. I hope to see more of you. And as always I hope all of you have a blessed day or night!




Rose says...


Hi! Thank you for the kind words, I appreciate it!



AkuRashomon says...


You're welcome!



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59 Reviews

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Sun Apr 23, 2023 10:58 pm
TheCornDogEnthusiast wrote a review...



Hello!
This short poem is very inspiring and has a positive message. The idea that belief is a prerequisite for receiving what one desires is a common theme in many self-help and motivational teachings. The second stanza encourages the reader to appreciate the beauty of the world and to see it beyond what they have learned, which is a great reminder to stay curious and open-minded.

The final stanza, which reminds us that family can come together at any time, not just in December, is heartwarming and emphasizes the importance of family and connection.

Overall, this poem offers a beautiful and uplifting message that encourages the reader to believe in themselves and the world around them. Well done!

Approved by the Corn Dog Enthusiasts Association (CDEA)




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Sun Apr 23, 2023 6:20 pm
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Kaia wrote a review...



Wow! Such simple words say a lot! I'm not very good with poetry myself, but I really enjoyed this poem. So, let's get into it!

The first stanza really reminds me of the fact that you really have to set your mind to something to get it done. You have to believe that you can go do something before you actually do that. Only that way, will you accomplish what you want accomplished. Sometimes the hardest part of doing something is convincing yourself that you can do it. Very relatable :)

Second stanza...understand beyond what you are taught. Keep learning, I feel like is the lesson here. Keep teaching yourself to see beyond what others see...to think and observe for yourself.

And the final stanza is my favorite. Remember to appreciate special moments and keep your relationships good...even when it doesn't seem to be the season to do so.

Keep up the good work, Rose!

-Kaia




Rose says...


I appreciate the feedback, it means a lot. Thank you!



Kaia says...


You're totally welcome! I really appreciated your feedback on Rehenowa. :)



Rose says...


Sure thing! It was my pleasure.
Your story is like the perfect potion with "awesome", "fascinating" and also some "wonderful" mixed in it.



Kaia says...


Ha, ha, thank you so much! *Purple heart emoji*



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Mon Apr 17, 2023 10:28 am
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Mikatsune wrote a review...



Hii, MIka here for a quick comment/review!

I really like this poem. It's short but just lovely, it made my day just by reading it!
You can do anything if you believe! The world is beautiful, you just have to open your eyes! The ending for this poem was just perfect! Family can be together, connected by their hearts! I like the fact that you made some words rhyme, when you read them aloud, it's pleasant!

There was something I wanted to point out, though.

"Only if you understand

that if you just look around

you can see the beauty of the world

it's so much more than what you've learned" It's a little odd that there was no rhyming here, but then rhyming again in the third part. This could be intentional, so take this feedback with a pinch of salt! Awesome poem, keep it up! A boost of hope and happiness....

have a great day/night/afternoon




Rose says...


Hey there @Mika Honeydew,

Thank you so much, I appreciate your feedback!

-Rose



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Sun Apr 16, 2023 5:18 pm
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Rose says...



Greetings!

Thanks for reading my poem and taking the time to do so.
I'm always looking for feedback!

-Rose

https://rosewriting12.blogspot.com/





I have writer's block. I can't write. It is the will of the gods. Now, I must alphabetize my spice rack.
— Neil Gaiman