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Young Writers Society


Raven's Haiku Collection I

by RavenAkuma

I love haikus! I tend to overwrite things normally, so the short length and strict structure is a neat challenge to help "rein it in" when needed. In the spirit of NaPo and poetry, I wanted to share some favorites from my collection. These ones are themed around my original characters from "The Forsaken Race" universe. Bonus points if you can dissect who is who (no pressure, haha!). Please enjoy!

The Fox scares those near

With a mask of malice to

Hide her pain and fear


A Wolf wise and strong

Even facing brokenness

Can still bear his fangs


A Butterfly brings

Light, radiance, and color

To such a dark world


The Hawk is bold

He tears through foes, but sometimes

A friend will bleed too


The Hyena brings

Pain to foe and love to friend

And laughs at either


A Dragon can speak

Soft, but when challenged can still

Spit hellfire and strike


A Bear gains her strength

With the hits she gives and takes

Her power is earned

Is this a review?



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1004 Reviews

Points: 96
Reviews: 1004

Mon May 06, 2024 12:14 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...

Hello there, Raven! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!

Shalt we commence with the possessed S’more?

Top Graham Cracker - This is a haiku on characters from your story “The Forsaken Race”, about what they’re all like.

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - This is fine, I didn’t see anything to edit.

Chocolate Bar - I may not know who the characters are, but I like how you used animals to relate to their personalities. It adds extra details into how they’re like and gives an idea as to who they are.

Closing Graham Cracker - A haiku that would work well as an introduction to your story, I enjoyed reading this, with how the characters seem to come to life through words.

I wish you an amazing day/night! ^v^

RavenAkuma says...

Hi, Vampricone! Glad you enjoyed, and thank you very much for reviewing this piece! :D

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26 Reviews

Points: 780
Reviews: 26

Sun Apr 07, 2024 9:18 am
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KaavyaK says...

This poem is awesome. You have great poetry skills.
I don't know anything about 'The Forsaken Race' but the way you described the happy and the dark side of an animal's life is incredible.
Poetry is always a way to show your inner feelings in words.
Nice work, keep it up.
Waiting for Collection II.

RavenAkuma says...

Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed! ^^

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61 Reviews

Points: 212
Reviews: 61

Sat Apr 06, 2024 1:57 am
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keeperofgaming wrote a review...

I feel like this is relating to Leightning.

His ferociousness is clear to many as he embodied a true demon that even Timbur feared, when it was neccesary.

He is kind to his family, bickering, and making games, but showing compassion.

He shows kindness to Kita, by allowing her to prosper and learn, even if she's a sylph.

He is quite compassionate, but menacing too.

RavenAkuma says...

Close enough! Each haiku covers all seven of the Zyreans!

Spoiler! :
The order is: Thundur, Leiytning, Seyber, Timbur, Zin, Scorch, Jem

Thanks for reviewing this! I never feel confident posting poetry so this boosts my spirits lol.

keeperofgaming says...

Cool. I see the vision now

It always seems impossible until it's done.
— Nelson Mandela