z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Diet Coke

by fatherfig


 I'm not a diet coke kind of girl,

But lets face it I'm in a diet coke world,

there are more on the shelf every day,

and I just have one thing to say,

I'm not a diet coke kind of girl,

I like my coke sweet in and out,

I'm not fake healthy,

all of these diet cokes make me want to shout,

but I have to be stealthy,

I'm not a diet coke girl,

but I'm in a diet coke world,

they've undermined,

the way diet is defined,

I'm not a diet coke girl,

because diet means less bad intake,

it means better for you,

lower stakes,

better food.

I'm not a diet coke girl.

in this diet coke world,

we haves those diet coke boys,

making all that noise,

Fooling all their toys,

having all their joys,

but just know,

I've never been a diet coke girl. 


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25 Reviews


Points: 0
Reviews: 25

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Tue Feb 25, 2020 1:41 am
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Knight731 wrote a review...



Okay, first of all, I found this super funny. (Sorry if it wasnt meant to be.) Most poetry is filled to the brim with dark subjects or sweet ones such as live or hope.

Your poem on the other than was more on the hurmorus side and that is something I think I can say we all can appreciate.

The lines were very well written and you seemed to have no trouble transitioning (which is impressive to me because even I struggle with that.) And I very much appreciate that.

Keep up the great work and keep writing from the heart.




fatherfig says...


Thank you for the review.



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461 Reviews


Points: 7451
Reviews: 461

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Mon Feb 24, 2020 11:48 pm
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Horisun wrote a review...



This poem has a very important message, I feel. I think SidPorter1 said it best in the review below. However, I do think that this poem is mislabeled. It's labeled as 'humor' but I don't really feel that was your aim with this poem, correct me if I'm wrong.
I think that your rhymes were very clever, however, I think the scheme was a little off, the rhymes seemed to come and go. That's just a minor nitpick though.
Overall, this was a really interesting poem to read, and I look forward to reading more from you. Keep on writing, and have a good day!




fatherfig says...


Thank you for the review.



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Points: 70
Reviews: 14

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Tue Nov 05, 2019 1:12 pm
SidPorter1 wrote a review...



The poem is lovely, it talks about how dieting in our generation has gone awry. Companies market good health with carcinogenic materials. They try to make a quick buck on the health of humans and it's very sad.
Your poem is a scathing expose on how the world turns people. The author ends with being true to herself saying I'm not a diet coke girl




fatherfig says...


Thank you for the review. I love your interpretation of my poem. Thank you.



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Points: 33
Reviews: 4

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Tue Nov 05, 2019 12:37 am
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FloraPoems wrote a review...



Hi, I thought your poem sounded really interesting(love the title!!) and decided to read it. I’m very glad I did! This is just a really fun poem, and I know it’s been said earlier but it really does sound like lyrics for a pop song. The rhymes and repetition of the “I’m not a diet coke kind of girl” make this feel very light and airy, but the meaning of your poem feels deeper than most pop songs! I like the message of not being fake(sorry if I misinterpreted, that’s just what it felt like to me) and you get across your beliefs very clearly. Overall a really great read, thanks for writing!😊




fatherfig says...


No you interpreted it very well actually, and thank you for your review.



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232 Reviews


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Reviews: 232

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Mon Nov 04, 2019 9:03 pm
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LadyBug wrote a review...



I saw your post and the title looked interesting, so I thought I'd give it a try.

This is a "bubbly" please excuse my future puns, I am NOT sorry poem that is "sweet" and lighthearted.

I feel the rhyme gives it a childish little twist and you pulled it off well, which is rare. It had a little unique "pop" that I loved.

The only critique is maybe don't be so repetitive, but it's your artistic choice. I love this and am definitely going to read more of your work.

Have a great day or night <3

P.S. This is literally just me seeing how many dad jokes I can fit into a review, I'm sorry, I had more but restrained.




fatherfig says...


Thank you for the lighthearted review. <3



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215 Reviews


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Reviews: 215

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Mon Nov 04, 2019 7:39 pm
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WinnyWriter wrote a review...



Hello! This is a cute poem, and reading it made me feel happy. It almost sounds like it could be a song. I really like the concept of it.

Some of the phrases you used make your work come alive, such as "fake healthy" and "lower stakes." The way you've used rhyming makes it stick in the reader's head a little bit more. However, the rhyme is subtle enough that it doesn't distract from what you're saying.

I like how you've shown that we don't all have to fall into the world's status quos and expected norms. We don't have to let what everybody else is doing define us. It isn't always wrong to go against the gain and stand out.

Good work here. :) I enjoyed it. Keep writing.




fatherfig says...


Awe thank you, I am glad you liked it. I am glad to see a new reviewer as well, it is refreshing. (At least to my work you are new anyway. You can't be that new, just look at those points falling out of your pockets! Good lord.)



WinnyWriter says...


Sure! I love reviewing! And I am about a month old. ;p




No matter what happens I'll always know there's a quote of mine in the YWS quote generator.
— looseleaf