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Rebellion Against The Pigs

by MasterGrieves


  1. Burn down your Union Jack
  2. And burn down your US flag
  3. The stars and stripes in piles of ash
  4. The stars and stripes wiped on my ass
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And spill their blood
  4. Choke on it
  1. Rebellion in response to the pigs
  2. Preaching us on how to live
  3. I fuck who I choose if it's a guy or girl
  4. Just when you thought you were in control
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut the throats
  3. And spill their blood
  4. The UN must listen
  1. Capitalists don't know the truth
  2. I in fact use what I've learnt in my youth
  3. This stuff will get too Orwellian
  4. So let's start a rebeliion
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And spill their blood
  4. Like the book says
  1. This is just another police state
  2. And this is just something so fake
  3. A government with so many flaws
  4. "Blame it on the hookers and the whores!"
  1. But just
  2. Shut up about ladies
  3. If women ruled the world it would be a better place
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And spill their blood
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And spill their blood
  4. Youth is alive
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And spill their blood
  4. Choke on it
  1. Kill pigs
  2. Cut their throats
  3. And smash their skulls
  4. And smash souls
  5. In two


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1464 Reviews


Points: 83957
Reviews: 1464

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Tue Jan 31, 2012 6:02 am
JabberHut wrote a review...



Hey, AJ! I apologize for being late to the party here, but I managed to leave something anyway! :D

It's definitely a forceful song, but that's really not the issue I see, so I think you're good in that area! The tone of the piece definitely shows, and some of the content is supported very well by that. So it's a great start, really!

There were some parts I was confused about. For instance:

Burn down your Union Jack
And burn down your US flag
The stars and stripes in piles of ash
The stars and stripes wiped on my ass


Where does the Union Jack come into play? The rest of the verse (and even the song) seems to be America-directed, but the Union Jack is English, isn't it?

Kill pigs
Cut their throats
And spill their blood
Choke on it


Any reason the attackers would want to choke on their blood? That seems a bit counter-productive!

Capitalists don't know the truth
I in fact use what I've learnt in my youth
This stuff will get too Orwellian
So let's start a rebeliion


This doesn't make sense to me. xD Capitalism and Orwellian society don't really... mingle. Orwellian is Big Brother/George Orwell's 1984 reference, ja? Capitalism is not only directed toward the economy, but it's not the government that [should] control[s] it. It's the businessmen -- the people. Sssso, I think this verse shows a misunderstanding of politics/economics. Unless that's how the speaker learned it in their youth, which then emphasizes the fact that the government is controlling schools so much that the students are being taught the wrong things. ...I'm not sure that's what you were going for though. xD

Kill pigs
Cut their throats
And spill their blood
Like the book says


The book? oO May I ask which book tells them to spill blood of their enemies?

But just
Shut up about ladies
If women ruled the world it would be a better place


I didn't even consider this when I first read it, but... is this song supposed to be feminist? xD (That is, in support of female rights -- to put it generally.) 'Cause lolz, that last line is sexist lykwoah. And I say this because it doesn't seem to really fit with the song. In fact, now that I think about it, I wonder if there are too many ideas being thrown in here -- so many that there wasn't a message or conclusion drawn from it all. Rebellion, durh. But the 'why' isn't very clear. Or the story, I guess. It's not really there. It's close! But it's still confusing enough to where I'm lost now.

----

So what I liked about this piece was:

1) you had awesome vocabulary and references. I was very impressed by this, and it certainly works extremely well with your song. The references were politically-based. It was just... so well done. I can't really put my feelings into words!

2) the pattern/parallelism used with the chorus, so to speak. Very awesome and effective.

There were really just the minor details I was concerned about. The overall picture is a bit confusing though. I couldn't tell what the... setting was, I guess. What the problem was. The speaker's blaming the government for something, but either the reason is so bad that I dismissed it or it's just not clear enough. And to reiterate before, I thought this was more US-oriented, not UN-oriented. When I think rebellion, I think of the 60s-ish with the Civil Rights Movement and such.

But it's really a great start, and I think it could turn into something even better once the message clears up!

Keep writing!

Jabber, the One and Only!




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Sun Jan 29, 2012 3:04 pm
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Blues wrote a review...



This isn't much of a review at all, since I have no idea to do with anything in poetry, but I *will* say I like it. I like the style, the flow, and I think it's all really good!

Adam wrote:Capitalists don't know the truth
I in fact use what I've learnt in my youth
This stuff will get too Orwellian
So let's start a rebeliion


Two things here. First, line 18 (second line) is a bit long and interrupts the flow. I think it's a bit too long.

Second, you spelled Rebellion wrong. You put two 'I's and only one 'L' when it should have two 'L's and one 'I'.

But that's it. I love it!

(This is a test of the new check box. Which is good.)





You are all the colours in one, at full brightness.
— Jennifer Niven, 'All the Bright Places'