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16+ Mature Content

She treats me through the night (blues)

by Lord Anzius


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for mature content.

I gotta woman
Way outta town
An' I've been workin'
so hard I could've drowned
I gotta woman
An' she ain't in town
Been working
more than was allowed.


But when I come home we never fight
she treats me fine through the night

I gotta woman
an' she ain't around
I work from morn' till morrow
with sweat on my brow
I gotta woman
An' she loves me right
Motivates to work through the night

When I come home we never fight
Co's she'll treat me through the night

[guitar solo]

I gotta woman
Way outta town
I've been working to get her
a nice gown
I gotta lady
You won't see around
I've been making that money
To make my honey proud.


And When I come home we never fight
My lady she'll
Treat me through the night.
_________________________________________

Not the "bluest" blues out there and probably more upbeat than most of my recent songs, but It came to my head and I had to write it down. 


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80 Reviews


Points: 5229
Reviews: 80

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Wed May 10, 2017 4:18 pm
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Jurelixranoanad wrote a review...



Hi, J here for a review.
I'm a big fan of country music so when I saw this in the green room I knew I should review it.
So I read it and I loved it, you have TALENT which is something I'm not sure Nashville looks for anymore. Legacy pointed out a awkward part in the song and I found nothing else to hate on. I want to here this someday on my country playlists.

Good Job and Keep Writing!!




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126 Reviews


Points: 144
Reviews: 126

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Wed May 10, 2017 1:55 pm
papillote says...



Hi,
I can't help it. When I read the first two lines, I think about Ray Charles' "I've got a woman".

« Well, I've got a woman
Way over town »




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145 Reviews


Points: 402
Reviews: 145

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Wed May 10, 2017 1:22 pm
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Thisislegacy wrote a review...



Legacy here for a review.

This sounds good. You have your rhyme scheme set up nicely and your verses set up perfectly (in my opinion).

"I've been working to get her/ a nice gown" is the only awkward part of the song because there isn't enough syllables in the "a nice gown" part. I would recommend adding a small word (about 2 syllables) to help the flow some more.

Nice song, only a little bit of editing needed. I would love to hear this sung and with the music behind it. Could you let me know if that ever happens. Legacy.





Pain is filtered in a poem so that it becomes finally, in the end, pleasure.
— Mark Strand