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Great Britain vs. America in the Revolutionary War (School Assignment) (Made with @KaPo21)

by LZPianoGirl, KaPo21


Great Britain: @LZPianogirl

I am Great Britain.

I believe in taxation without representation.

I wonder why America wants freedom.

I see my soldiers fighting.

I hear the gunshots.

I feel the wounds of my soldiers.

I touch the barrel of their rifles.

I am Great Britain.

I worry about losing American resources.

I cry because of all the men that die.

I understand their fears.

I say, “Fight or we shall lose!”

I dream of winning.

I hope we never fail.

I am Great Britain.


America: @KaPo21

I am a human being

I believe that my people should be justified

I wonder about what lies ahead of me

I see the lives that people leave behind to fight for the better of their people

I hear the ringing in my ear from the gun that is fired

I feel the hands of men who lie on the ground

I touch the dry ground as I wobble to a stance

I am a soldier

I am worried about what I will lose at the end of every fight

I cry because I miss the laughter of my family

I understand what I am risking with every fight

I say what I want

I dream for the better of my people

I hope to stay standing through every fight

I am America


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25 Reviews


Points: 154
Reviews: 25

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Sun Jan 26, 2020 4:18 pm
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GirlWithATypewriter wrote a review...



Hi LZPianoGirl!
It's GirlWithATypeWriter here for a review!
Right off the bat, I loved the way you started the poem. The "I am Great Britain", "I am America" in bold sets the mood of the entire work. Also, I think it's great that you and @KaPo21 have chosen to write about a historical event and the fact that you guys have made it a poem is really appreciable because as a writer I think it's a challenging topic to write on. I like how you've connected the entire poem by juxtaposing the struggles of the two countries although quite different, the pain seems to be the same.
The best part about your poem is the last two lines of each stanza which goes:

"I hope we never fail.

I am Great Britain."

"I hope to stay standing through every fight

I am America"

These lines finish the poem on a really solemn note filled with emotions as they so beautifully put forth their respective goals of solicitude and survival.

Overall, great poem and I hope to see more from you.

Happy writing!

XOXO




LZPianoGirl says...


Thanks!



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Points: 198
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Sun Jan 26, 2020 7:19 am
Theva says...



Hey LZPianoGirl & KaPo21! The lines which you choose for your poem are a very strong and emotional one. I really appreciate you both guys that you have written very well about the Revolutionary War. Each line stresses the reader to feel about this poem. Your presentation is awesome.




LZPianoGirl says...


Thanks!



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535 Reviews


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Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:18 pm
Magebird wrote a review...



Hi, @LZPianoGirl and @KaPo21! I saw this poem lurking in the Green Room and thought I'd give you both a hand by helping to get it out.

I think the strongest part of this poem is its juxtaposition. I love how the formatting of the Great Britain and America sections mirror each other, while also having a few minute differences. I don't know if this was part of the school assignment, but your decision to have one person write for each country was a great choice. It gave each section a distinctively different feel, and also allowed both of you to focus on the mindset of each country.

I especially liked the America section. The progression from human to soldier to finally America as a whole resonated with everything I've learned about the American Revolution over the years. The struggles @KaPo21 were ones I would have written about if I was doing this assignment. Overall, I found that section to be a very patriotic one.

I also liked the conflict in the Great Britain section. While they were obviously the enemy in the Revolutionary War, war is never clear cut. People fight with all kinds of motivations, and I think the Great Britain section captured that. I also like how Great Britain stayed as Great Britain; though it shows unity, it also shows a lack of humanity. It's a cool way to format the poem.

Overall, great job on this! I really liked reading it. :)




LZPianoGirl says...


Thanks!



Magebird says...


You're welcome. :)



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14 Reviews


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Sat Jan 04, 2020 12:16 am
CJ6233 wrote a review...



Hi! I just want to say, I hope this went good for you at school, and this seems so cool! I like the second part and especially the way it changed from 'I am a human being' to 'I am American' whereas with Great Britain it just stayed 'I am Great Britain'. This is really good. Uh... I think that's about it from me! :) Again, really cool!




LZPianoGirl says...


Thanks! It did go well for us at school!



CJ6233 says...


Yay!



CJ6233 says...


Yay!




Nothing is impossible, for the word itself says, 'I'm possible!'
— Audrey Hepburn