HOW IS THIS STILL UP ON THE SPOTLIGHT ITS BEEN OVER A WEEK
I don't like thinking.
I think, the irony worth a chuckle.
I don't like the fact that I am so me.
I think while I sigh heavily.
---
The night time is the worst.
The monster knows I am alone,
No Sam or Ash.
No Kara or Izzy.
No Lake.
It knows.
And it strikes.
---
You are too emotional,
The monster whispers.
You are too immature,
It snarls.
Stop crying, its just insufferable and annoying.
And eat less.
Or eat more.
It tells me.
Stop.
I whisper.
No.
The Monster snaps.
---
It whisper words that my family has told me, warping them.
It twist the words of Sam, the one I love the most.
It makes me think my friends just deal with me.
It makes me think that I shouldn't be here.
---
Just, let. Them. Go.
They don't care about you.
It whispers while brushing its hand against my cheek.
I shake my head.
Oh, come on darling.
You really think they care?
That they like your writing?
You have no chance in that field.
It whispers.
I shake my head again.
---
The monster will never leave.
Why?!
Because,
The Monster is me.
Hey there! It's ZeldaIsShiek here to review another quintessential piece of literature that made my day and win this Review Day by helping the Red Pandas stay in first place and reaching my goal of 80 reviews. I might even get to 100, if I work hard enough. I am really excited to review this amazing piece of art that you have created, and maybe add some witty humor as well. Anyway, that's enough idle chatter from me. Let's get into the review.
This poem delivers a very powerful message on self-doubt and how you can really be destroyed by the monster inside of you that is relentless and always says that no one cares about you. No matter how small the monster is, it is always there, and for some people it is bigger. I am really sorry and I understand how this feels to a degree. Always know that you can talk to me if you need to and that I am always here to review your writing. I really love you as one of my best friends and as a writer, and you should never let your monster tell you otherwise. This poem is so perfectly formatted and worded that I have found nothing wrong with it. It is amazing in every way I could view it. Just remember to be yourself and talk to your friends all of the time for support. <3
~Zelda
i love it! i love how u express ur emotions in this. and i know what it's like to be the monster
i love it! i love how u express ur emotions in this. and i know what it's like to be the monster
Are you okay with reviews on this? I wanted to review it but it seems a bit personal so I would like to ask your permission first. Thanks!.
Wow. Just WOW I can’t believe how much feeling you put into this poem. Using your own feelings and your experiences is very brave. I love the flow and the thought you put into this piece. I definitely think you made it so that many different people could relate to this poem and to gove their thoughts on thw sibject of the monster within. The monster within is sometimes strong and sometimes weak but for some in it always strong or weak so one might always seem “different” than the norm and this poem portrays these differences, good job and if writing is your way of coping then keep it up! Cheers.
Oh. My. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How do you know to write the way into my heart!? I love how you write all the names of your friends and loved ones. And I'm guessing that because I was last I'm the most importanto person to you? Or is it the opposite, that I'm your least favorite person? If so, that's ok, you're still my most favorite person on here! 
I love this, it flows well. The words italicized, in bold, they emphasized all the emotion you expressed. Which is why I love it so much! 
Great job Fluma!
I won't say what I always say because I know you will!
Thanks for sharing! I enjoyed reading this very well-expressed, dramatic poem which describes the inner struggle that some person's have with themselves. Sometimes the inner struggle might be so intense that it might appear as if it is alien, or an unauthorized intrusion of some monstrous entity into the inner sanctum of our minds which we consider inviolable.
Such a struggle, in some cases, can be diagnosed as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and treated with medication. On the other hand, if the struggle is indeed against an intruding entity, such as a demon, then such medical intervention would prove ineffective.
In any case, the poem does very skillfully describe this inner wrestling and finally at the conclusion identifies the culprit as being the person himself. It reminded me of the film Forbidden Planet where the aliens had invented a machine that ultimately caused their subconscious or Id to go rampant. As are all your writings, this one's also a very artistic rendition of a reality.
Addendum:
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), formerly considered a type of anxiety disorder, is now regarded as a unique condition. It is a potentially disabling illness that traps people in endless cycles of repetitive thoughts and behaviors. People with OCD are plagued by recurring and distressing thoughts, fears, or images (obsessions) they cannot control.
https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/obs ... disorder#1
@Dreamworx95 @DemonGoddess @woahhitherepal @WhosabellCanWrite @TheBlueCat @LittleLee @269609 @Lake @LordTachanka @LadyLoki @AnneTaylor @Danni88 @GreenTea @Murphy2493 @Helena13 @emolemon @wordwing @SpaceSnickerdoodle @LJF
120,192 Literary Works • 649,009 Reviews
Points: 0
Reviews: 206
Donate