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the weight of absence

by Elektra



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Stickied -- Tue Sep 17, 2024 10:06 pm
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Elektra says...



Text Version:

I miss how you crushed me without a second thought,
like I was fragile and you enjoyed watching me shatter.
I still feel your hands in the empty space you left,
and somehow, I lust for the sharpness of your words.
I want to erase you, to burn every image of us,
but losing the hurt feels like losing you all over again.
And somehow, that terrifies me more than the agony ever did.




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Wed Sep 18, 2024 4:45 pm
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EllieMae wrote a review...



Hey Ley! OH MY GOSH. This is fantastically beautiful. Seriously, I love this and every way. Let's jump right into the review, shall we? (:

In this poem, we see a reflection of presence, and then the weight of absence. A reflection of presence seems filled of memories of someone who hurt you deeply. Perhaps just their presence was overwhelming, and did not provide you with an environment where you were capable of healing. I think you combined some very unique emotions in these words. For example, when you talk about yearning for their sharp words. That's something that I can really relate to. Sometimes when someone has hurt you for a long time, you yearn for those feelings again, because they're all that you know, and they feel safe somehow.

I want to erase you, to burn every image of us,
but losing the hurt feels like losing you all over again.


I think the title of this poem perfectly sums up the line. Absence has a weight. It's an emotion that I can't quite put a name to, but perhaps a mixture of yearning and reflection and loss for who you could've been. These are probably my two favorite lines in the whole poem. I also like how you combine these other elements, for example, burning some thing with fire. Do you want it to be gone forever? Do you have enough courage to finally light that match and set it ablaze?

I like the symbolism of the word healing, being spelt out in the poem. It's interesting though looking at this I can see so many other words besides the word healing. I can also spell out words like pain. Just because healing is something that is bolded or emphasized, doesn't mean that all the other emotions aren't there. This is so symbolic to me and I love it. The redness of the word healing is lovely too. Red is often associated with blood or something evil, which I think makes sense. Sometimes healing can make you feel like a bad person even though you're doing what's right for yourself. I love this so much.

Overall, this phone was really deep. It's probably the most deep poem I've ever read from you. Fantastic work and I can't wait to read more of your poems soon!

Your friend,
Ellie




Elektra says...


Thanks Ellie!



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Wed Sep 18, 2024 12:14 am
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AkiraEliza wrote a review...



hi! I'm just going to say that I have a massive headache but I'm really bored. not the best combo for a really long review, sorry!
I like how you spell out "healing" that's the first thing I noticed. mostly because I looked at the read letters wondering what was up with those.
I kind of like the way you put this. I'm sure a lot of people can relate to this, especially me. you live with the pain, sooner or later, you know? it almost becomes a part of you. and one day, after going so long with losing that pain, you will realize how empty your life has been without someone that was your entire world. moving on is not the same as being happy. you can move on and be "content" but nothing will ever be the same again. I'm glad that you decided to keep that person in your memory, though. instead of forgetting about them. trying to forget someone is never a good idea because it always comes back to haunt you ten times harder when they pop into your mind.
I hope this sounded okay. sorry if it didn't sound much like a review. have a nice day!




Elektra says...


Thank you! <33



AkiraEliza says...


no problem!




I don't think so alliyah, but don't quote me on that.
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