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Young Writers Society



I've Seen it All

by Elektra



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30 Reviews

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Reviews: 30

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Fri Jun 21, 2024 8:31 pm
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Lullaby wrote a review...



Hi, Ley, I took immediate interest in your poem and really wanted to share my thoughts!

I think the concept of this poem is so unique and incredible. It's one I never thought to write about, and your creativity really shows. The poem starts out a bit fun and simple but turns into something more meaningful and purposeful. The transition from "I" to "we" and "us" is perhaps my favorite part of this poem. The line

Because when you look into me, I become you.
is the true turning point of the poem and the resolution is beautiful. The mirror talks about this image of beauty, but something switches in the last stanza that goes from comforting to a little ominous through the finishing words "all you can be." I'm sure this line is meant to be uplifting, but I took it to be something a bit darker in a subtle way.

I think it would be really cool to play around with the different things this mirror has witnessed, which can either turn the poem into a poem of adoration or a poem of jealousy or darkness. There is so much you can do with this concept of writing from the perspective of a mirror and that's what is so cool about it.
Overall, I really enjoyed this poem and I feel inspired to write my own poem about different perspectives of everyday objects.

Thank you for sharing this piece and I hope to read more work from you. Much love
- Fleur




Elektra says...


Thank you for the suggestion <33 I'm glad this poem inspired you!



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Fri Jun 21, 2024 6:57 pm
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Coffeewriter wrote a review...



Hi there Ley!
^^ I love how it’s structured and I love the effect the font has on the whole poem. It is very philosophical and gives off warm fuzzy feelings yet a deep sadness too. It’s interesting.
It talks about how shattered and filled with layers a person can really be and I’m here for it! I feel like it talks about how we tend to hate ourselves and we forget that we aren’t bad people and we don’t deserve that. Our inner child doesn’t deserve a future where they cry and cry in their bedroom, isolated from society and loved ones. Love it!!




Elektra says...


Thank you! :D



Coffeewriter says...


:)



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Fri Jun 21, 2024 1:58 pm
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EllieMae wrote a review...



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Wow, more Ley poetry!!! This makes me so so so happy. It is wonderful to see poems from you, as well as more poetry in the Green Room for poetry reviewing obsessed people like me so let's jump right in!!

I often watch others walk by without a glance,
And I'm repaired each time I crack.


Right from the beginning, I was very intrigued. This mirror watching people passing bye, not even realizing the reflection that the mirror shows. It is almost forced to imitate everyone that it sees. Perhaps this mirror could symbolize a person who feels like they are wearing a mask, only showing a combination of others that watch them. The mirror, speaking, states that every time they crack, they are repaired. I first interpreted this crack/repairing as being broken in a way that allows the mirror to not have to be perfect. A crack would make the reflection broken, seen as weak, but not broken completely. But then as I read more, I started to think that maybe you meant that everytime the mirror gets cracked, it is physically repaired and fixed, so that it is perfect once again. so the others around it cannot even let it be imperfect.

I like what you wrote about the mirror fogging up, which makes it hard for both parties involved to see. The mirror becomes us when we look into it. You detail some specific events that the mirror has seen, like losing a tooth and having a first kiss. My recommendation to improve the emotional depth of that part of the poem would be to reference another , more painful event. The mirror has seen everything that maybe np other person in the world has ever seen, so maybe this is all the mirror knows. Perhaps something darker, without the mirror even understanding the full depth of the pain. If that makes sense at all.

My favorite lines:

I can't visibly speak, but we're beautiful,
And I wish I could tell you that.
I wish I could tell us that.


The 'we' instead of you was an interesting choice. To me, using a 'you' there might have been emotional as well, in a different way, showing that the mirror understands the separation and that it will never actually live life first hand. But the option you chose shows more hope, so I like that route too. Overall, wow, this was my favorite poem that I have read this week!! Amazing work and I really hope you most more poems <3333

Your potato friend,
Ellie

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Elektra says...


Thank you once again for the awesome review Ellie <33



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Fri Jun 21, 2024 7:17 am
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Corlz wrote a review...



Hi Ley,

Love this piece of work.

Sometimes we have the ability to mirror to people the darkest aspects of their soul. Some appreciate it and use it to heal, others not so much. This sometimes makes us feel like ghosts walking the earth watching life as it goes by.

Surrounded by people but still alone.

We seem to not form real connections with those around us, maybe it's just because we see through the bullshit. We see others around us obtain things that we can only wish and/or long for.

Sitting with your inner child and comforting her, being the figure she needed when growing up is a sense of comfort and healing one cannot describe to anyone.

Your piece, without really knowing the theme behind it, spoke to those aspects of realisation in my own life. It was personal, and I love work that doesn't tell you what to make of it or what you need to experience by reading it. It touches a part of you and brings it to the forefront.

Really well done!

Keep going

xxx




Elektra says...


Thank you! <3




I have a Gumbie Cat in mind, her name is Jennyanydots; Her coat is one of the tabby kind,with tiger stripes and leopard spots.
— T.S. Eliot, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats