z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Beach side night

by Corvus


The stir of the waters

Caressing the shore.

The sea turned shells

Smoothed to the core.

Soft white sand

Under feet so light.

Here and now

On this silent night.

    

The pine in the wood

quietly sways.

The sea is covered

With violet haze.

Wind in the trees

Softly sings,

a tune never heard

But still, it rings.

    

In the moon’s reflection,

Spirits dance.

The tides swirling

In a perfect trance.

The night is silent,

Warm and still.

The seabirds rest

Atop the hill.


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31 Reviews


Points: 67
Reviews: 31

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Sun May 26, 2019 1:40 pm
GirlWithATypewriter wrote a review...



Hey CorvusQueen, it's GirlWithATypeWriter here for a review.
First off, I really applaud you for having written such a beautifully phrased poem.
Secondly I love how you've used simple English, nothing flowery and yet you portray such a strong imagery. There's something about this poem that just calms me and I can honestly imagine myself sitting on the white sand, hearing the soft swish of the waves. You manage to portray quite a soft and soothing image, so hats off to you.
Finally, I really appreciate your rhyming skills. It isn't easy to rhyme sensibly and you've managed to just that and not at any point did I feel the rhyming was forced.
Overall a wonderful poem and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Keep up the great work.
Xoxo




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Points: 34
Reviews: 4

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Sun May 12, 2019 1:17 pm
AS04 says...



Hi, this is a very well written poem! I like to use rhyme in my poems too, so I really liked how you used it in yours, especially in the first stanza: The stir of the waters

Caressing the shore.

The sea turned shells

Smoothed to the core.

Soft white sand

Under feet so light.

Here and now

On this silent night."

I love the imagery you create with your choice of words. I can understand exactly what you're talking about and the message that you are trying to convey in your poem!.




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616 Reviews


Points: 122617
Reviews: 616

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Fri May 10, 2019 1:58 am
FlamingPhoenix wrote a review...



Hello, It is I FlamingPhoenix again, here to talk about your poem again on this lovely day, and to help get this work out the green room.

Okay let's start.

So may I just say WOW!! This poem is one of the best I have ever read, your title choice is still as good as ever, it drew me in again to read your poem, and I couldn't take my eyes away from the screen as I was reading. Your riming is really good, everything just flowed so well together like a dance. And your choice of words were amazing, I never would have thought of them. Your spelling was really good, along with your punctuation.
I'm also happy this poem was long, it aloud me as the reader to say in this little world you have created. Because to me with the words you chose to use it painted a really good image in my head, and I just with I could say there for ever, so amazing job.

I am happy to say I couldn't find a single thing wrong with it, so that will be all from me for now. I do hope you will post again soon. Never stop writing and have a great day or night.

Your friend
FlmaingPhoenix
Reviewing with a fiery passion.




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118 Reviews


Points: 7386
Reviews: 118

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Fri May 10, 2019 1:12 am
FabihaNeera wrote a review...



Hello,

I love this poem... reading through each line just have gave me such a calm feeling. I could really picture everything you were describing! I like the length of each line to better convey what feelings and senses you were describing. The structure of the poem itself is well done, and so are the rhymes! Each line flows really nicely to the next. It's overall really well written!

Keep Writing. :)





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