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Young Writers Society


18+ Language Violence Mature Content

How Do You Plead: 10.4

by Brigadier


Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.

Morgan gave a slight gasp as Winslow pulled away. The detective ruffled the young patrolman’s hair before walking out of the library to meet Reilly in the hall. He knew that the coroner had most likely been waiting in the main hallway for a long time after the frantic telephone conversation they had earlier. Winslow walked over to the seated doctor who was either carefully watching the movements of the crime scene detectives or staring off into space under the influence of a mysterious cloud.

“I’m so sorry for dragging you down here in the middle of the night-”

The detective was interrupted by the coroner leaping from his seat to tightly grab him around the shoulders. This embrace only lasted for a few seconds before Reilly quietly said, “I was so afraid that when you called me that you had done something else reckless to your health. I know that you’re an old man at heart and experience, but your body is still very young.”

Reilly didn’t give Winslow time to answer as he started leading the detective up the stairs to the crime scene. They passed by the master bedroom, the maid’s room, and a few guest rooms. Winslow guessed that the widow and the maid had retired to one of these rooms to express the frustrated emotions in the library interview. The sound of shouting became more evident as Winslow stepped into O’Keefe’s room where Reggie sat on the victims bed. His arms were extended as he shouted to the police officer, “I did not kill that man. I simply came here to interview him.”

Reggie attempted to stand up from the bed, pointing at Winslow and saying, “I came here with him to interview a witness who sent us a tip and now you’re accusing me of murder.”

“Please just have a seat, sir, until Detective Smith and Dr. Reilly can talk to you,” explained the nameless officer.

Winslow motioned for the officer to leave the room as he said, “We’ll take it from here, officer. Go down stairs and help with the crowd control.”

The still nameless officer remained motionless at the bed side, the muscles around his eyes straining slightly in the dim room. He cautiously walked over to the butler’s window, took a look out onto the lawn, and then turned back around to ask, “What crowd, sir?”

A smirk crossed his face as the comment escaped from his lips. A constant stream of glares were exchanged between Reggie and the officer before Winslow stepped in between them. While the balding patrolman might have had a height advantage over the seated military intelligence official, Winslow had a good three inches on him in several different places. The detective preferred to gather respect from the officers he worked with, but this stubborn ass didn’t want to go that route.

“There is going to be a crowd of people out there any minute inquiring about the death of the butler and its connection to the death of the man of the house,” Winslow paused while carefully choosing his next words. “So, you can either walk down those stairs and out to the front lawn-”

“Or what, sir? Are going to throw me down the stairs?”

“No,” Winslow whispered as he took a step even closer to the officer. “If you don’t leave immediately, I’m going to throw you out of that window and then the coroner will have another body to take away tonight.”

The detective stepped back far another to see the blood draining from the man’s face, but still in range to protect Reggie from further threats. Winslow had spent enough time protecting the Scot to know when he needed protection. His stare down only lasted for a few more seconds before the officer excused himself from the room. This exit barely got a look of recognition from other officers in the vicinity. And it got no response from the crime scene detectives who were carefully combing through every scrap possible - they were used to the drama.

Winslow wished he could tune it out like they did as he sunk down on the bed beside Reggie.

“Winslow, you didn’t need to do that. In fact, you shouldn’t have done that. What if that officer goes to his superiors about you harassing him like that?” Reggie asked as he slowly regained his breath.

Before Winslow had a chance to give a smart alack answer about being the boss, he was reminded of Reilly’s presence as the coroner explained, “Winslow doesn’t need to worry about disciplinary action because there’s no way Internal Affairs would ever believe a tip off from that guy.”

“Why not?”

“Because Winslow is one of the few cops they don’t have to investigate for being dirty and Officer Jackson there is being investigated for being on the take. From what I say tonight, it looked like he recognized you, mister, and he was probably given a special assignment concerning your life.”

As Reilly said the word “mister”, Winslow realized that these two probably hadn’t been introduced. If they had been introduced at another point in time, one too many poisonings or shootings or having his skull cracked open had forced the memory out of the detectives head.

“Dr. Reilly, this is an old friend of mine, Lord John Reginald Smith,” Winslow explained as he pointed to the frumpled spy sitting on a messed up bed sheet. The detective chuckled a bit as he further explained, “And I guess y’all can figure out how it works the other way.”

The two men smiled at each other with seductive grins that Winslow knew all too well. Having bedded both of them, the detective could only imagine what it would be like to be in bed with the both of them. He observed their flirting for a few minutes before offering a cigarette and lighter to Reilly as a gesture to get the investigative show on the road.

Reilly passed the lighter back to Winslow, took a few puffs on his newly lit cigarette. Winslow lit one of his own cigarettes and asked, “So are we going to see the essential evidence that you found, Doctor, or are you two just going to flirt all night?”


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1485 Reviews


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Sun Jun 28, 2020 4:23 pm
IcyFlame wrote a review...



I should really keep reading this at a proper pace seeing as you keep posting chapters! Please do feel free to tag me when you post. I'll try to get up to date by then!

The detective was interrupted by the coroner leaping from his seat to tightly grab him around the shoulders.

I know I've commented on this before, and perhaps it's due to me not reading the chapters together (so I forget in the meantime) or possibly due to them being posted in sections, but it can become confusing as to who is who when you refer to them by their job titles.

I know that you’re an old man at heart and experience, but your body is still very young.”

An odd point to make, isn't his 'old man experience' more likely to make him do things cautiously/safely?

explained the nameless officer.

I don't think you need to specify that he's nameless. Just 'explained the officer' is fine.


The detective preferred to gather respect from the officers he worked with, but this stubborn ass didn’t want to go that route.

For me, I haven't seen enough of this officer to agree with Winslow so it feels like he's being a bit presumptive.

“Or what, sir? Are going to throw me down the stairs?”

Here's where I would put that previous line.

He observed their flirting for a few minutes before offering a cigarette and lighter to Reilly as a gesture to get the investigative show on the road.

Does he just mean the smiling, or are they actively flirting? I don't think you need to say he observed their flirting as you then repeat it in Winslow's speech.

I'm not sure how much this furthered the story, but I'm interested to see the essential evidence. And I can't help but root for Reilly and Reggie... oh dear!

Icy :)




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Sun Jun 28, 2020 4:05 pm
Ventomology wrote a review...



Oh man Winslow gets around, doesn't he. I'm impressed.

I took the time to read 10.2 and 10.3, which, as any good mystery should, only raised more questions. I suspect that even for people who have been following this work from its beginning, every chapter has inspired a lot of theorizing and questioning, and that's super amazing. I always want to just answer the questions right away.

Also, kudos to you for basically always ending each chapter/part with so much tension. I forgot to mention how great the one at the end of 10.1 was, but since I'm sure people reading from the beginning knew about the wiretap, it probably got them very excited. This cliffhanger was awesome too, and is at least half of the reason why I'm going to finish up and move on to 11 right after this. (jk I was going to anyways but. It's very good)

I kind of wish we had a little more detail about the place itself. It feels to me like there should be some level of luxury in this house and time period, and it might be nice to add in little flourishes that show that. Additionally, you can learn a lot about the inhabitants and their lives by the way they decorate. There doesn't need to be a lot of it, and you probably don't want long passages of description, but the occasional thing of note would add something to the characterization of the house and the people who live in it. (This is just the example that occurred to me first, but given how this household was split in half, there might be different decorative styles in the areas that Mr. and Mrs. Johnson typically inhabited).

But this is a lovely mystery on all levels. I especially love how much we learn about Winslow throughout the story. I feel like a lot of hero-detectives are not given much character of their own beyond deductive reasoning and a single trait, and Winslow's constant recollections of his romantic/sexual entanglements make him seem a lot more like a real young person.

On to the next part!

-Vento




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Wed Jun 10, 2020 7:57 pm
WaterSpout wrote a review...



Greetings, CaptainJack, I am here to review(I'm not sure why I keep saying that if you already know; probably 'cause I need an intro). bare in mind plot twists, character development, and plot altogether is not my strongest suit. What I will try and help you with is grammar and small errors here and there. If you were not looking for that, I am sorry to disappoint, you may as well skip all of this, since it will waste your time. I hope I am not wasting your time.
Without further ado, I will get started.

The sound of shouting became more evident as Winslow stepped into O’Keefe’s room where Reggie sat on the victims bed.

Add an apostrophe. You know why.

Go down stairs and help with the crowd control.”
The still nameless officer remained motionless at the bed side, the muscles around his eyes straining slightly in the dim room.

I can't believe I'm pointing this out, but could you delete the space in between down and stairs? Or just add the in between, both are correct. But while we're at it, could you also take the space in between the word bedside away as well? Thanks, greatly appreciated.

A constant stream of glares were exchanged between Reggie and the officer before Winslow stepped in between them.

Now this one is tricky. I wanna say change were to was, but it just wouldn't make sense reading it like that, don't you think? I'll leave it up to you.

“Or what, sir? Are going to throw me down the stairs?”

Now this one is a proper error! Add you in between Are and going.

The detective stepped back far another[b] to see the blood draining from the man’s face, but still in range to protect Reggie from further threats.

Change another to enough.

“Winslow doesn’t need to worry about disciplinary action because there’s no way Internal Affairs would ever believe a [b]tip off from that guy.”

Here's another unnecessary one. Add a hyphen.

Having bedded both of them, the detective could only imagine what it would be like to be in bed with the both of them.

You don't need the.

Other than that, you did great. Good job!
Hopefully this doesn't waste your time or anything.

With caution,

WaterSpout





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