by ArtisticForever, Liberty500
I made a bubble mountain.On a water fountain.
The bubbles flew away,but I still stay.
I smile as a bubblelands on the rubble.
It goes POP!And I drop!
And why exactly do I?'Cause I saw a bee fly!
Hello, I'm here with a short review for you on this lovely day, and I saw this was your first poem, so I new I had to come have a look.Okay let's start with the review shall we? Right so this poem, was really sweet and it gave me a flash back to my childhood. And it's really nice to no there is still poems like this so sweet, something that will make you read over it a million times. I just adore the little story behind this poem, it just something I saw myself doing as a child. I think your punctuation was spot on, everything was in the right place, giving this poem the best flow, making the read easy and enjoyable. I think this would be a really good poem to read to a child before bed.And I just love these types of poems. So I hope you will write more like it and post it on YWS soon. Have a great day or night.your friendFlamingPhoenix. Reviewing with a fiery passion.
Hallo, I’m here with a short review! This poem is really pure and simple, which I like. I feel like this is some reminder that not everything is always deep, and this poem is lighthearted enough to make you smile~I feel like you would write awesome children poems :3Oh and the picture reminded me of spongebob for some reason XDAnnnnywayyysss~ That’ll be all from me-Alice
This was cute and pretty lighthearted! Made me smile and I really enjoyed it.The picture is pretty, too!
What is that? Over there? It's a review on the Horisun!This poem was really good! I love the randomness, and I finished with a smile on my face. There wasn't to much I want to point out about this, because I feel this is one of those poems that are simply perfect the way they are.Though, I don't know, maybe someone else will come along, and nitpick this to the core. Though really, I don't see anything that needs pointing out, great job!As always, keep writing!
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