"MOM NO!!!!"I screamed as they lifted her lifeless body out of the car.
My dad and older brother Zak were holding me back and checking me for injuries.
"NO!LET ME GO!MOM!"I screamed and tried to jerk away from them. My dad let go and fell to his knees crying but Zak held on and pulled me tightly against his chest.
"It's ok,We'll get through this,we will." He whispered into my hair.
"NO!" I screamed and fell to my knees.
That night Zak sat down on the couch next to me and slung an arm around my shoulder.
"It's my fault." I whispered and tears ran down my cheeks.
"What?Jersey,no its not." He said and turned his whole body to face me.
"Yes,it is, If I hadn't of wanted to go to the mall we wouldn't have crashed and mom wouldn't be dead." I cried into his shoulder and felt him starting to shake.
"Jersey,Its not your fault,Please,Never think that." I looked up at him and saw he was crying.
"You two should get to bed."I heard my dad's voice from the kitchen. Zak stood up and gave me one last hug before heading to his room but I just stood there.
"Jersey?Honey,are you okay?" My dad was standing in the doorway with a worried expression.I shook my head and started to cry again.
"Daddy." I whimpered and he pulled me into a hug.
"It'll be okay baby,I promise,we'll get through it." He whispered into my hair.
"But daddy,what if we don't?" I asked.
"We will." He promised.
A few hours later I was laying on my bed crying when there was a tap on my door.
"Jersey,I can't sleep.you up?" Zak poked his head throught the door and Immediatly saw my face and walked over to me.
"Do NOT blame yourself." He said sternely and pulled me into a hug.I buried my face in his shoulder and cried. I eventually fell asleep because when I opened my eyes again sunlight was pouring through my window and my clock said 3:00p.m.I crawled off of my bed and walked down stairs and saw my dad and Zak eating lunch at the table. Zak saw me and smiled.
"See,told ya she'd be up for lunch.Here sis." He said and pointed to a plate with food piled up on it.
"Ya,and she also won't eat all of that either."My dad said. I can't believe this,there acting likle nothing happened.Like mom was in her jewelry room as always.I sat at the table and toook a bite of my sandwhich. I wasn't hungry but I managed to force half of it down. When I looked down at the other half I felt a wave of nauseous.
"I'm full" I said an dpushed away my plate.I could feel my brother and dad stare at me as I walked to the bathroom. I leaned over the sink and took a deep breath. The food was making me sick,how cold I-I paused in mid thought and looked at my toothbrush. I picked it up and slid it down my throat. I gagged and bent over the toilet,Throwing up what little I had eaten.
'Sis,you ok?whats up?" I heard Zak's voice and a slite knock. I didn't pay attention,I just focused on the ringing in my ears.A few minutes later I heard him walk away and looked in the mirror. I looked like crap. I looked down at my arm and saw I had a sliver or something in it from the crash. I grabbed my shaver and gently took out one of its back up blades. I pressed it against my skin and dugg the sliver thing out. Hm,I liked the feeling,It made me feel good. I set the blade on one side of my wrist and slowley brought it to the other. I watched as my skin tore away from itself as a gentel pulse of crimson pushed through the cut. I felt myself smile and slipped the blade in my pocket.