Young Writers Society

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to it,

Screams surrounded me as the army of bunnies charged toward us. Their razor sharp teeth flashed as they opened their mouths to bite chunks out of us. They're fluffy cotton ball tails turned into spikes that they used to impale us.

They just kept coming, brown and white and gray. Soon they all became blood red. These were called the Ravaged Bunnies. We saw thousands of them kill our comrades, so I swore that I would slaughter every last demon bunny. So, I tried to uphold my sworn duty.

I cut down bunny after bunny until there was enough blood to drown new York city. But they just kept coming, thousands after thousands of blood red bunnies.

I fought my hardest, but it was no use. Bullets bounced harmlessly off of they're fur, and only swords could kill them. The only problem with that was that you had to get close to them, and they usually stayed in groups of seven or eight. So basically, close range was suicidal, but there was no other option.

This was how the Rabbit Wars began...

i thought it was really violent with a very funny twist to it! Just the way i like it!
I think you did a great job turning every little girl's favorite animal(other than a pony) into an evil creature of DOOM!!
I thought it was kind of short, but I still loved it. It made me laugh, so Great Job!!
keep writing!

Soon they became blood red.

A very funny and creative story.

So, everybody else already commented on your mistakes, but even with the errors it was a great story. Someone mentioned Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and I definitely agree! That was the first thing that came to mind. This story really made me laugh. Good job. And I agree that if you make a continuation, I would read it.

Oh lord! this has permenently changed my views on bunnies. Haahaa dont know how I am gonna sleep at my cousins house when I know that those bunnies outside verywell might want to kill me haha.
Very... entertaining!

-jedi

Hi,

Oh, by the way, my previous review was my way of saying you did a fantastic job! :] Few mistakes, but that's okay! Good job!

Farewell,
A.

Hi,

Oh my. So, my war got to you? Mission successful. You are welcome. :]

Farewell,
A.

(I'm new, so this is my first review. Bare with me!)

I saw the title, and immediately had to read. First of all, I lead the assault...

Just kidding, I was part of the organization that was against this war.

Anyway c:

I really loved this, and it has very few flaws. The repetition is good in some ways, by showing how many rabbits there are and how they just keep coming, but you may have overused it just a little.

I loved your vocabulary, you could have just said

They're fluffy cotton ball tails turned into spikes that they used to stab us.

Soon they all became blood red. These were called the Ravaged Bunnies.

Bullets bounced harmlessly off of they're fur, and only swords could kill them.

I love it!!! It is so creative. There werr a few grammar mistakes as the people above me pointed out, but I enjoyed it! Bunnies turn EVIL! I hope to see more random stories from you!
Your new friend/follower,
Name

DEATH TO ALL BUNNNIES!!!!!!!!!! I loved it it was really creative and funny!

MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL!!!!!!!
This was the first thing I thought of. (And if you haven't seen the movie, see it. You'll understand.)

Haha! Yeah, I think rabbits are evil, too, they just seem like serial killers, don't they? They're the last things you'd expect in a murder.
I find the logistics a bit off, though. Something that is small and traveling at high velocity will not penetrate the bunny fur, but a slow-moving long knife will? Explain. The swords would have to be extremely sharp, and stay that way the entire time. I think maybe a hammer would be better, if that would work.
So you have some grammatical mistakes and stuff, but I think the real issue you've got is this has no plot yet, which I think would be good, since bunnies really are evil. The word must be spread.

Pretty funny. I had a thing against squirrels back in high school. Overall, short and interesting. I understand that this piece was just for fun so I will just point out one thing. In two places where you wanted to write "their" you wrote "they're" also there is no need to write "off of" just "off" is sufficient. These two sentences, "The only problem with that was that you had to get close to them, and they usually stayed in groups of seven or eight. So basically, close range was suicidal, but there was no other option." felt out of style with the rest of the story. Other than that it was definitely fun. Would be interesting to read a continuation if you ever decide on it.

No wonder my dog barks at them...
Neat-o little story. (No one says neat-o anymore, do they?) I liked it. I just saw a few grammatical errors I thought I'd correct.

so I swore that I would slaughter every last demon bunny. So, I tried to uphold my sworn duty.

drown new York city

bounced harmlessly off of they're fur

This was how the Rabbit Wars began

No wonder my dog barks at them...
Neat-o little story. (No one says neat-o anymore, do they?) I liked it. I just saw a few grammatical errors I thought I'd correct.

so I swore that I would slaughter every last demon bunny. So, I tried to uphold my sworn duty.

drown new York city

bounced harmlessly off of they're fur

This was how the Rabbit Wars began

Well, I was talking with my girlfriend, and she saw a bunny out the window and said how adorable they are, and I said they're evil because they help crazy people with mustaches. Lol

Well, I was talking with my girlfriend, and she saw a bunny out the window and said how adorable they are, and I said they're evil because they help crazy people with mustaches. Lol

that's pretty funny. Whered you get the idea for it from?