Hello!
VioletFantasy here to give you a review. This is a really cool poem. It’s the perfect length in my opinion. It’s long enough to have a good amount of detail, but it’s short enough to easily read. Now, onto the specifics.
as poor jack
stays behind to watch
with six sick sad eyelids
drooping and pleading
in silence
This was definitely my favorite part of the poem. It’s a sad part, but it is the most descriptive part too. I can really imagine Jack staring out at the boats, full of sadness.
One thing that might help to make your prom even better is if you changed the format. It is a little irregular as of now and it definitely hinders it. If you split up the lines differently and make stanzas, the flow will be improved. Other than that, this poem is awesome! Keep writing!
Points: 1305
Reviews: 53
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