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Young Writers Society



lessons i will forget (to learn)

by LadyBug



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9 Reviews


Points: 51
Reviews: 9

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Wed Feb 01, 2023 9:32 pm
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Jasperbiscuitt wrote a review...



Love it! I love how you clarify that it is a dream but it feels more like a nightmare. I enjoyed the format, as well. It defies regularity, just as the dream itself foes. My only suggestion would be to add along with the month, the time and day. The more time-specific the piece is, the more sensitive and urgent the dream will feel. Keep writing! It's so good!!




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355 Reviews


Points: 2099
Reviews: 355

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Tue Jan 31, 2023 8:28 pm
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LadySpark says...



BEAUTIFUL.




LadyBug says...


THANK YOU!!



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8 Reviews


Points: 43
Reviews: 8

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Mon Jan 30, 2023 11:30 am
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MissSaigon wrote a review...



Hi, so I think you did a great job here!

The tags and the poem fit pretty well with one another. The lyrics kinda remind me of a book I read. I really like that.

The start of your poem makes the reader wonder who the lyrical-me is and who that person was that the lyrical-me was referring to. It leaves many questions open, yet those questions romanticize the whole poem and help it come to life. This romanticism makes it more dramatic and helps the reader’s imagination go wild. The lack of explanation of circumstances leaves the reader in awe and lets them imagine a whole story connected to the poem which is very very inspiring for authors.

“I wish it was real.”

This line indicates that it was a dream or an illusion. It softly brings the reader back to reality and expresses the desire of the lyrical-me for love very well.
It’s a great way to make the reader relate too. The reader starts to immerse in the world of the lyrical-me and still doesn’t understand it very well, asking for more. The wish to read more grows within the reader, making them read the poem multiple times willing to find answers to their questions/find more inspiration to let their imagination drift off!

I really like this poem! It’s amazing!





"Beneath this mask, there is more than flesh. Beneath this mask, there is an idea, Mr. Creedy, and ideas are bulletproof."
— V for Vendetta